Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever

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Funny Pickup Line Song!!

Cute, Stupid, Dumb and Funny Pickup Lines: Best really funny pick up lines. Here is a collection of some of the best cheesy, funny, stupid, bad and sweet pickup lines.

Here is a collection of dumb and funny and cheesy and bad pickup lines and chat up lines. Remember, InnocentEnglish.com can’t be held responsible for any drinks thrown in your face when you try to use some of these. Funny pickup lines aren’t always the ones that give you the desired result! If you do use any, good luck! And please add your own Funny Pickup Lines and Chat Up Lines at the bottom. But take a minute to see if someone else already posted it…

Here they are: Some good pickup lines: (and we use the word “good” pretty loosely here…)

 

I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock!

Is your dad a thief or something? Because someone stole the stars and put them into your eyes!

I’ve heard sex is a killer. Want to die happy?

Excuse me, but I’m new in town, can I have directions to your place?

Can I buy you a drink – or would you just prefer the five bucks?

I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.

I wish I were a tear so i could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.

Am I cute enough yet? Or do you need more to drink?

You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.

You know what would look great on you? Me.

Can I read your T shirt in brail?

Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.

You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.

I think I need to call heaven because they’ve lost one of their angels.

Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best a man can get!

Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after.

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

The body is made up of 90% water and I’m thirsty.

Baby you must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night!

Are you an overdue book? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you!

How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice- can I get your number?

I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

You know, winning the lottery doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together.

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, you’de be called McGorgeous.

All those curves! And me with no brakes!

Can I even get a fake number?

You’ll do.

And more funny pick up lines:

Excuse me for interrupting and I’m not trying to make a pass, but you must be leaving the country if you’re packing that much ass.

You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everyone we did anyway!

Your mom was pretty good, so i figured you would be too.

I would say God bless you but it looks like he already did.

It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.

Damn, I’m glad I’m not blind!

If I followed you home, would you keep me?

If I told you you had a gorgeous body, would you hold it against me?

You look like my second wife! And I’ve only been married once!

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Do you believe in love at first site, or should I walk past you again?

If you were Sprite, I’d obey my thirst!

Excuse me can I borrow a quarter, it is an emergency. My mom told me to giver her a call the first time I fell in love.

I lost my number, can I have yours?

Let’s make like fabric softner and snuggle

Do you like bananas or blueberries? Why? I wanna know what kind of pancackes to make in the morning.

Hey baby. Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m not a poet, but damn girl, you’re hot!

Hi there. Inheriting 50 million dollars doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

Page topic: Some of the best and worst pickup lines: Good, bad, cheesy and sweet pick up lines and chat up lines for picking up a girl or guy at a bar…

1,261 thoughts on “Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever”

  10. (tell them to hold their hand out) (then grab it and say…)

    ok say theres a river in the middle of your hand (draw line with finger)

    and there is a bunny rabit on one side trying to get to the other (point were bunny is)

    how is he going to do that?

    (when she/he says i dont know say…)

    me neither i just wanted to hold you hand.

  11. I fell down and bumped my head when you walked into the room so i need your name and number for insurance reasons

  15. I cut my finger, will you kiss it better? *kiss* I cut my lip.

    Do my shoes match my eyes? *looks up and down* You just checked me out

  23. hi, my name is (your name here). you’re gonna need to know that cuz you’re gonna be screaming it later tonight.

  31. I was listing all the reason why I love you with each star, I was doing great till I ran of out stars.

  37. You guys are hilarious, by the way these pick up lines do not work, maybe it would make a funny joke and make the girl laugh, but if you’re planning on doing this on a girl you never met, good luck..
    Also everyone on this website has terrible grammer.

  38. if you where a library book i would check you out :)

    oh no! im choking i need mouth to mouth!

    if you were words on a page youd be fine print

    Can i have directions…..to your heart

    (grab the persons butt) and than say “is this seat taken?”

    I play the field looks like i just hit a homerun with you! ;)

  45. Love is a sensation,
    Caused by a temptation,
    To feel penetration,
    A guy sticks his location,
    In a girl’s destrination,
    To increase the population,
    or the next generation,
    Did you get my explnation ?,
    Or do you need a demonstration ? . ! :)

  49. your homepage…or mine?!

    you look alot like my next girlfriend

    you look like my first wife(how many wifes have u had!?!)… NONE

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