Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever

Funny Pickup Line Song!!

Cute, Stupid, Dumb and Funny Pickup Lines: Best really funny pick up lines. Here is a collection of some of the best cheesy, funny, stupid, bad and sweet pickup lines.

Here is a collection of dumb and funny and cheesy and bad pickup lines and chat up lines. Remember, InnocentEnglish.com can’t be held responsible for any drinks thrown in your face when you try to use some of these. Funny pickup lines aren’t always the ones that give you the desired result! If you do use any, good luck! And please add your own Funny Pickup Lines and Chat Up Lines at the bottom. But take a minute to see if someone else already posted it…

Here they are: Some good pickup lines: (and we use the word “good” pretty loosely here…)

 

I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock!

Is your dad a thief or something? Because someone stole the stars and put them into your eyes!

I’ve heard sex is a killer. Want to die happy?

Excuse me, but I’m new in town, can I have directions to your place?

Can I buy you a drink – or would you just prefer the five bucks?

I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.

I wish I were a tear so i could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.

Am I cute enough yet? Or do you need more to drink?

You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.

You know what would look great on you? Me.

Can I read your T shirt in brail?

Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.

You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.

I think I need to call heaven because they’ve lost one of their angels.

Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best a man can get!

Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after.

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

The body is made up of 90% water and I’m thirsty.

Baby you must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night!

Are you an overdue book? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you!

How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice- can I get your number?

I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

You know, winning the lottery doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together.

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, you’de be called McGorgeous.

All those curves! And me with no brakes!

Can I even get a fake number?

You’ll do.

And more funny pick up lines:

Excuse me for interrupting and I’m not trying to make a pass, but you must be leaving the country if you’re packing that much ass.

You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everyone we did anyway!

Your mom was pretty good, so i figured you would be too.

I would say God bless you but it looks like he already did.

It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.

Damn, I’m glad I’m not blind!

If I followed you home, would you keep me?

If I told you you had a gorgeous body, would you hold it against me?

You look like my second wife! And I’ve only been married once!

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Do you believe in love at first site, or should I walk past you again?

If you were Sprite, I’d obey my thirst!

Excuse me can I borrow a quarter, it is an emergency. My mom told me to giver her a call the first time I fell in love.

I lost my number, can I have yours?

Let’s make like fabric softner and snuggle

Do you like bananas or blueberries? Why? I wanna know what kind of pancackes to make in the morning.

Hey baby. Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m not a poet, but damn girl, you’re hot!

Hi there. Inheriting 50 million dollars doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

Page topic: Some of the best and worst pickup lines: Good, bad, cheesy and sweet pick up lines and chat up lines for picking up a girl or guy at a bar…

1,261 thoughts on “Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever”

  1. I’m easy, are you?

    Guy: My magic watch says that you don’t have on any underwear. Girl: I do Guy: Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast

    I may not be mr. right, but i’ll do you till he shows up.

    I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I’m the only one talking to you.
    [The rest are under “crude pick up lines”]

  2. i love all these pick up lines…i know that i would fall for all of them if someone had said them to me….they are great!!!!

  3. I lost my teddy bear. Will you sleep with me?

    Baby, I’m like Taco Bell. I’ll spice up your nite.

    Are you a zoo? Because you bring the animal out in me.

    You’re not the best looking thing here tonite. But really, beauty is only a light switch away.

    Are you a magician? Because ever time I look at you, everyone else disappears.

  4. Hi. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?

    Hey, didn’t you hear? The modeling convention was changed to tomorrow.

    Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the cash?

    Hi. So, smile if you want to sleep with me.

  5. OMG THESE PICK UP LINES ARE AAAAAAMMMMAZZZING!!! I MEAN GOSH WHO WOULDNT FALL FOR THESE!!

    THIS TOTTALLLY IMPROVED MY GAME AND LOVE LIFE

    THANKS A MILLION!!

    EMMA

  6. screw me if im wrong, but havent we met befor?
    hey i know u, u r the person with a beautiful smile!
    what winks and is like a jackhammar gir:What guy:(wink)
    how do u get 10lb outta fly? (unzip pants)
    i envy ur lipstick, can u put some on me?

  7. MAN:Do you wanna dance? Girl:NO MAN:Sorry i guess u didnt hear me correctly i said you look fat in those pants

    If u were a booger id pick u first

    I noticed u noticing me so i just wanted to put u on notice that i noticed u too

  8. Do you like fruits?
    because your the apple of my eye.

    My neck hurts..
    because as soon as you walked by i whipped my head!

  9. do u wash ur panties in windex cuz i can sure see myself in them.

    you be my dairy queen and ill be your burger king. you treat me rite and ill do it your way!

  10. Got me? I’ll do your body good.

    Ever since I met you, you’ve lived in my heart without paying any rent

  11. did you eat lucky charms for breakfast? because you look magically delicious.

    if you were a pirate, would you want the bird on this shoulder(touch closest shoulder) or this one(wrap your arm around and touch other shoulder)?

  12. Omg..Let’s play house, you can be the screen door and I’ll slam YOU ALL night! :] (Yeah, you know you want it!xD)

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