Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever

Funny Pickup Line Song!!

Cute, Stupid, Dumb and Funny Pickup Lines: Best really funny pick up lines. Here is a collection of some of the best cheesy, funny, stupid, bad and sweet pickup lines.

Here is a collection of dumb and funny and cheesy and bad pickup lines and chat up lines. Remember, InnocentEnglish.com can’t be held responsible for any drinks thrown in your face when you try to use some of these. Funny pickup lines aren’t always the ones that give you the desired result! If you do use any, good luck! And please add your own Funny Pickup Lines and Chat Up Lines at the bottom. But take a minute to see if someone else already posted it…

Here they are: Some good pickup lines: (and we use the word “good” pretty loosely here…)

 

I may not be Fred Flintstone but I can sure make your bed rock!

Is your dad a thief or something? Because someone stole the stars and put them into your eyes!

I’ve heard sex is a killer. Want to die happy?

Excuse me, but I’m new in town, can I have directions to your place?

Can I buy you a drink – or would you just prefer the five bucks?

I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.

I wish I were a tear so i could start in your eyes, live on your face, and die on your lips.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.

Am I cute enough yet? Or do you need more to drink?

You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot.

You know what would look great on you? Me.

Can I read your T shirt in brail?

Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes.

You know what? Your eyes are the same color as my Porsche.

I think I need to call heaven because they’ve lost one of their angels.

Is your name Gillette? Because you’re the best a man can get!

Do you believe in the hereafter? Well, then I guess you know what I’m here after.

Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

The body is made up of 90% water and I’m thirsty.

Baby you must be tired because you’ve been running through my mind all night!

Are you an overdue book? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you!

How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice- can I get your number?

I have Skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?

That’s a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

You know, winning the lottery doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together.

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

If you were a new sandwich at Mcdonalds, you’de be called McGorgeous.

All those curves! And me with no brakes!

Can I even get a fake number?

You’ll do.

And more funny pick up lines:

Excuse me for interrupting and I’m not trying to make a pass, but you must be leaving the country if you’re packing that much ass.

You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everyone we did anyway!

Your mom was pretty good, so i figured you would be too.

I would say God bless you but it looks like he already did.

It’s a good thing I have my library card, because I’m checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I’m reserved for someone else.

Damn, I’m glad I’m not blind!

If I followed you home, would you keep me?

If I told you you had a gorgeous body, would you hold it against me?

You look like my second wife! And I’ve only been married once!

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

Do you believe in love at first site, or should I walk past you again?

If you were Sprite, I’d obey my thirst!

Excuse me can I borrow a quarter, it is an emergency. My mom told me to giver her a call the first time I fell in love.

I lost my number, can I have yours?

Let’s make like fabric softner and snuggle

Do you like bananas or blueberries? Why? I wanna know what kind of pancackes to make in the morning.

Hey baby. Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m not a poet, but damn girl, you’re hot!

Hi there. Inheriting 50 million dollars doesn’t mean much when you have a weak heart.

Page topic: Some of the best and worst pickup lines: Good, bad, cheesy and sweet pick up lines and chat up lines for picking up a girl or guy at a bar…

1,261 thoughts on “Funny Pickup Lines: Best pick-up lines ever”

  1. Guy:Does your bed get cold on one side at night? Blonde Girl: yes..
    Guy: Well i will come over about 10pm and fix it

  2. Excuse me, but could you help me with my phone?
    I can’t get it to work, I think it needs your number.

  3. Hi iam (your name)and your cute (actually worked for me twice)

    I have a flashdrive, can I plug it into you real quick?

  4. (thorws random thing at girl) girl:what the hell guy: i just thought this would be a funny thing to tell are kids how we met

  5. ok, so i’m gonna ask you to dance and your gonna say yes and then we are gonna go back to one of our places and fall in love and then we’ll get married and have kids but then you’ll get upset that i “spend to much time at work” and accuse me of cheating on you and we’re gonna fight and then get a divorce and have to explain to the kids why mommmy and daddy are getting a divorce so let’s just save ourselves loads of time and trouble. wanna have meaningless sex?

  6. go over to girl and point to a friend in the distance and say: “see my friend over there?…..yeah wee he wants to know if you’ll kiss me?

  7. Your parents must’ve been bakers cause you’ve got a nice set of buns.

    Did you hear the latest health report? You need to up your daily intake of vitamin me.

    I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I’m the only one talking to you.

    If I had a nickel for every time I saw a woman as beautiful as you, I’d have five cents.

  8. (singing) “pussy cat pussy cat i love you!”

    “hey theres a great toy store down the road called Dickie Jr.’s fun games” wanna go there?

    you must be peanut butter cause your makin my legs feel like jelly!

    they call me coffee cause i smell great, taste great and keep you up all night!

    (from Kanye West’s Song) “excuse me little homey, i know you dont know me but i like to blow trees”

    you must be canada cause your making me feel like niagra falls!

Leave a Comment