We’ve all heard a clever and witty way to describe someone who isn’t too bright or who acts a bit unusual. Here’s a collection of some of the best funny expressions for describing people who are a little, um, what’s the delicate way to say it? Stupid. Gee, I wish there were another way to say that…
- He’s one taco short of a combo plate.
- A few beans short of a chalupa.
- one sandwich short of a picnic
- A few beers short of a six-pack
- One brick short of a load
- A few cards short of a deck.
- A few bees short of a hive.
- He’s one chopstick short.
- He’s one egg roll short of a Pu Pu Platter.
More expressions that are nicer ways of saying someone is strange, stupid, dumb or not very bright or smart.
- His rocket isn’t working on all thrusters.
- Redefined the term “Third Grader”.
- Needs jumper cable leads on her skull.
- Slept his way up the food chain.
- Check the air pressure in her head.
- The only thing that keeps it from going in one ear and out the other is the “For Rent” sign in the middle.
- In the event of a water landing, his skull may be used as a flotation device.
- Couldn’t find his butt with both hands if it had a bell on it.
- Someone needs to spackle her mouth closed before the rest of her intelligence escapes.
- He is a few fries short of a happy meal.
- His wheel is spinning, but the hamster is dead.
- Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.
- His antenna does not pick up all the channels.
- His brain downloads at dial up but uploads at high speed.
- His receiver is off the hook.
- He’s all foam no beer.
- He’s one coffee bean short of a cappuccino.
- As smart as bait.
- I think his slinky is so kinked it won’t slink.
- I think his skylight leaks a little.
- That boy doesn’t have all his dogs on one leash.
- I think her sewing machine is out of thread.
- That guy has a bit too much yardage between the goal posts.
- If brains were taxed, he’d get a refund.
- He’s eating with only one chopstick.
- Keeps his brain in good condition.
- not playing with a full deck
- to have bats in the belfrey
- to have kangeroo loose in the top paddock
- as crazy as a sack full of ferrets
- out to lunch
- as nutty as a fruit cake
- as mad as a hatter
- his elevator doesn’t quite go to the top floor
- the lights are on, but nobody’s home
- he’s not the sharpest knife in the drawer
- He’s 1 peanut short of a snickers
- He’s not hitting on all six cylinders
- He’s screw already hit the floor.
- His brother was an only child.
- Pretty house, but nobody’s home.
- He’s got a hole in his bag of marbles.
- I think his screen is missing a few pixels.
- His cord doesn’t quite reach the outlet.
- He’s a few channels short of cable.
- If clues were shoes he’d be barefooted.
- If his brains were dynamite, he couldn’t blow his nose.
- She can speak 200 words a minute with gusts up to 300.
- He has verbal diarrhea and mental constipation.
Page topic: Expressions for someone who is not bright. Funny ways to say someone is stupid, dumb or strange
He’s a couple of quarters short of a roll.
He’s a clown shy of a circus.
He’s a tree shy of a hammock.
His cheese done slipped off his cracker
He’s as sharp as a bowling ball
not the sharpest knife in the drawer
not the brightest crayon in the box
has one oar out of the water
dumber than a box of rocks
If brains were gas, he wouldn’t have enough to drive around the inside of a Cheerio
he is as sharp as a bowling ball
your as bright as a burnt out light bulb
want some cheese with your wine
your dumber than a sac full of potatoes
did your mother have any kids that lived
you couldnt poor piss out of a boot with the directions on the heel
The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train aint comin’!
the apple fell out of the tree and hit every branch on the way down
He was a real ace, but I might have mispronounced that a little.
She’s not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree
Couldn’t count his own testicles and come up with the same number twice.
Shes got the brains god gave a bag of rocks.
Couple french fries short of a happy meal
head full of sail boat fuel
He’s not the brightest bulb in the tanning bed.
He’s as dumb as a box of hair.
He’s not the sharpest tool in the shed.
About as bright as a burned out lightbulb
not the brightest crayon in the box
He’s as dumb as a block of wood and half as useful.
He has got to be twins one person can’t be that stupid!
Ain’t got both oars in the water.
poop
His thoughts wander frantically between his ears asking where did the brain go..
Couple carrots short of a casserole!
FUBAR
Not the full quid.
Missing a few screws
Not quite right upstairs.
Behaves like he’s drunk even when he’s sober
Not the brightest crayon in the box.
A few instruments short of an orchestra!