The best really stupid sayings and quotes from bumper stickers, T-shirts, & graffiti.Diplomacy is the art of saying ‘Nice doggie!’… till you can find a rock.
Sex on television can’t hurt you… unless you fall off.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
Drink ’till she’s cute, but stop before the wedding
Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines
Page Topic: Stupid Sayings and Quotes
Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese
I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week
I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met
I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol
I intend to live forever – so far, so good
I love defenseless animals, especially in gravy.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
If you ain’t makin’ waves, you ain’t kickin’ hard enough!
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
BEER: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.
I got a gun for my wife, best trade I’ve ever made.
So you’re a feminist…Isn’t that cute, honey!
Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.
Mental backup in progress – Do Not Disturb!
Mind Like A Steel Trap – Rusty And Illegal In 37 States
Quantum Mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.
Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have.
Televangelists: The Pro Wrestlers of religion.
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Give a man a free hand and he’ll run it all over you.
If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder…
24 hours in a day … 24 beers in a case …coincidence?
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked
something.
Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.
Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
Page Topic: A collection of the best really dumb, funny, stupid, hilarious, cute and witty sayings, quotes, bumper stickers, t-shirts and graffiti humorous one-liners and sayings.
Why do dumb people get wisdom teeth?I guess for them they`re called wis-dumb teeth
I swear to drunk I’m not God.
those are cool
but some i dont get
lol
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
When life gives you lemons…. you throw it at mean people and hope it gets in their eyes.
Life is tough….. GET A HELMET!
Why isn’t the #11 pronounced onety-one
When cheese gets it’s picture taken… what does it say?
Last night I played a blank tape and full blast…the mime next door went nuts.
Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
I’m not as think as you dumb i am!!!
When life gives you lemons: (3 choices)
A. Suck out all of the vitamin C and yell “EAT THAT, LIFE!!!1”
B. sit in the darkest corner and cut…
C. Find your best friend and say. “Life told me to give this to you. Appearently he got my cake mixed up with your lemons!”
Don’t be harsh… i made two of those up> XP
If I ate a bowl of alphabits this morning I could crap out better jokes than these ; P
he who laughs last thinks the slowest
There is always a light at the end of the tunnel, lets pray it is not a train.
When life gives you lemons ask for salt and tequila!
I saw this frisbe coming my way and i wonered why it was getting bigger and bigger, then it hit me.
When life gives you lemons, make orange juice, then wonder how the heck you did it.
I’m not running away from my problems!!!!!! I’m just hiding from them!
in a library where do they put the bible non fiction or fiction
when life throw you lemons…
SHUT UP AND EAT YOUR DAMN LEMONS!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAH, Whats wioth the lemons!?
its so bloody halarious, im pissing myself.
Good One guys!
– When life gives you lemons ask for salt and tequila!
– When life gives you lemons…. you throw it at mean people and hope it gets in their eyes.
– When life gives you lemons, make orange juice, then wonder how the heck you did it.
– when life throw you lemons…
SHUT UP AND EAT YOUR DAMN LEMONS!!!!!
Addiction takes commitment!
I’m not as think as you drunk I am!
If you think I’m a bitch, wait until you meet my mother!
When life throws you lemons… Chuck them right back and say, ‘I ordered a martini, Waiter!’
Never turn down a chance to yell, ‘STUFF THEM ALL!’
If you are in need of self-esteem, stand in front of your mirror and shout, ‘I am beautiful! I am perfect! I ROCK!’ This always works if you want some elbow room in public toilets.
When life gives you lemons… Squeeze Them In Peoples Eyes!
Give a man a hand and he’ll slap you with it!
i Rock !
cripplefit..x
pessimist:a person that looks both ways before crossing a one way street
Friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone sees it, but only you get the warm feeling it brings.
if you dont want you lemons throw them back at life
Captian Obvious strikes again!!!
Life is a three ring circus: Engagement ring, Wedding ring and suffering…
Okay When life gives you lemons… collect them one day life will stop and u would have the most lemons ever.
If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving is definitely not for you.
Life is a waste of time.
Time is a waste of life.
So get wasted all the time..
and have the time of your life!
those comments all suck get a life and dont try to make up dumb jokes they just make all you pathetic losers look dumb your not making the jokes the jokes are making you
When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
When life hands you lemons, throw them back and start over.
To do is to be-satre
To bes is to do-socrates
Do be doo bee do-Sinatra!!!
my gamer fragged your honer student
when you’re in a war instead of throwing hand grenades you should throw pumpkins because it will get the enemy to understand how dumb and pointless war is and while they’re thinking you can throw a real grenade at them!
HAHAHA!!! THE SAYINGS AR3 FUNNY BUT Y3T SOM3 I DIDNT G3T LOL!!!!!!
China is a large country inhabited by many chinese (charles De gaule (im a shit speller i dono if it is))
When life gives you lemons squeeze it in someone eye and hall @##
Everything Happens for a reason Excpet for clowns i mean seriously what the heck.
i’m not felling myself 2day may i feel u?
I did not hit you i simpliy high fived your face
when life gives u lemons find someone who’s life has given them vodka nd through a party
I’m multi-talented, i can talk and piss you off at the same time
when life gives you lemons? Stuff them up your top and make you boobs bigger!! :P
When life gives you lemons I say f*** the lemons and bail
-forgetting sarah marshall
Loves a Sensation,
Caused by Temtation,
A Man sticks his location,
Into the girls destination,
To increase the population,
For the next generation,
Do you understand my explanation,
Or do you need a demonstration?
this website is dumb
how many of these do u actually
think are funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I got some funny quotes =P
-When I finally met Mr. Right I had no idea his first name was Always!
-The more you think about things, the weirder they seem. Take milk for example. Why do we drink [cow] milk? Who was the first person who looked at a cows udder and thought “Im gonna drink whatever comes out of these things when i squeeze them”?
And
-Know what Im thinking? No. Neither do I. Isn’t that frightening?
Hope ya liked them!
If life throws you lemons, make lemonde.
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what do u get when u dross a elaphant and i rino???
eliphino
VAGETA, WHAT DOES THE SCOUTER SAY ABOUT HIS POWER LEVEL?
ITS OVER 9000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
if you can’t fix it with an asprin you have a serious problem!
when in doubt google it
if you die in an elevator make sure you press the up button
shit happens…miracles take a little longer
Yeah this really blows chunk’s … but hey I did do a search for dumb quotes…haha…who knew!!
when life gives you lemons throw them at stupid people
UM YUM YUM YUM YUM CAKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD