(1) Great. They have automatic weapons. We have carpet tacks.
(2) There not carpet tacks. They’re dry wall nails.
(1)You wish to enter the contest.
(2) We wish to win first prize!
1)She’s a 130-year-old, voo-doo witch who eats peaple?2)The Lord works in mysterious ways!
1.so when do u want us to come back and wash off the corpse?
2. yeah! and what about the medical college on his dic^?
Hey Mack. Gotta minute?
You guys go ahead; I’ll get gas.
“It’s 106 miles to Chicago, we’ve got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it’s dark, and we’re wearing sunglasses. Hit it.â€
Buster: It smells like dog shit in here.
Elwood: Don’t say ‘shit,’ kid.
(Buster puts cigarette in his mouth and raises lighter to it. Elwood grabs the lighter and cigarette and throws them out the window of the Bluesmobile.) You don’t need that shit, kid.
Buster: The Elwood Blues I know once said that no pharmaceutical product could ever equal the rush you get when the band hits that groove, the people are dancin and shoutin and swayin, and the house is rockin!
Elwood: Yeah, that was me.
Buster: The music, man. You know you miss the music!
Elwood: Thanks, Buster.
Mother Mary: Come in, Buster, and sit down. Elwood, say hello to Buster.
Elwood: Hi, how ya doin?
Mother Mary: Buster, say hello to Elwood.
Buster: Hi, how ya doin?
Elwood: Look at this, the kid’s a wise ass! (Mother Mary hits him with her pointer.) Ow, shit! (She hits him again.) Ow! I mean, uh…what a sweet kid!
Mother Mary: I wasn’t sure if you were going to come, Elwood.
Elwood: Hey, a letter from you is like a command, sister.
Mother Mary: Actually, it’s Mother Mary now.
Elwood: That’s a promotion, isn’t it?
Mother Mary: I was sorry to hear about Jake.
Elwood: Yeah. I guess he’s in a much better place. (Looks at statue of Jesus and jumps.) Where is Curtis?
Mother Mary: Curtis has gone on as well, Elwood. I’m sorry.
Elwood: So that’s why he stopped writin me. Curtis was the closest thing Jake and I had to a father. He gave us the music.
Mother Mary: You didn’t know that Curtis had a son, did you?
Elwood: Curtis had a son?
Mother Mary: Long before he came to us at St. Helen of the Blessed Shroud he had a musical group that toured the juke joints of the midwest. In one town, Curtis had an affair with a married woman.
Elwood: Go Curtis! (Mother Mary hits him with her pointer.) I mean, that’s terrible!
Mother Mary: That’s what I thought you meant!
Mrs. Murphy: You said when you got out of prison you was gonna be all finished with the Blues Brothers! You and I have built up a good business here! With the cash from the sale of the coffee shop I got us started in this mercedes dealership. What is the matter with you? And I continue to keep your pathetic friend on, even though he hasn’t sold a car in over two years!
Matt ‘Guitar’ Murphy: Yes you have, and no he hasn’t.
Mrs. Murphy: You talk straight with me, Matt Murphy.
Matt: I always do.
Mrs. Murphy: And you treat me with respect at all times.
Matt: I do, baby.
Mrs. Murphy: And you know what I mean when I say ‘respect!’ (starts to sing ‘Respect.’)
Robertson: Now y’all might thing we’re just a group of sad, sorry, sumbitches out here in a field jerkin each other off. Or you might just think…that we know somethin! I’m gonna tell you somethin else. The federal government has a computer. Now this computer is wired to a computer in Jerusalem (rolls eyes) and Moscow!
Other guy: There’s something in the river, Mr. Robertson.
Robertson: Where?
Other guy: I saw something…under the water, sir.
Robertson: Son…it’s okay to be nervous, okay? Uh…there’s enough explosives in that boat to blow up every post office in this country, you know, but no one knows we’re here. No one knows our plans.
(The Bluesmobile emerges from the water and takes their boat with it, on top of the car. Elwood rolls down his window.)
Mack: Hey, yous guys havin a picnic? (They all point their guns at Bluesmobile.)
Robertson: Don’t shoot, you might hit the boat!
Elwood: What boat?
Robertson: That’s the International Jewish Communist Conspiracy in action people! One of their spy satellites must have picked up our location… Kill them!
Stay away from drugs, gangs, and cyberporn on the Internet and you can be President some day.
That’s the International Communist conspiracy in action, people!
There not gonna catch us, were on a mission from God!
They broke my watch!
Those goons are orphan remnants of the post-Perestroika Soviet Secret Police apparatus which, until 1991, carried out its own twisted interpretation of the well intentioned original Marxist-Leninist doctrine using the State Security, which was massively corrupted by Beria at the end of the ’30s. Of course once a mass popular is coerced into such behavior as a permanent condition of their mind, a radical doctrinal, dialectic shift such as Glasnost, produces guys like these: stunned headless automata whose only purpose in their lives is the continuation of brutish measures to which their genetic code has been programmed since the fall of the Romanovs.
We won’t get caught, we’re on a mission from god.
We’ve got to get off this road. They’ve called ahead by now and you can’t outrun a Motorola.
You try any of that boojie-boojie crap on me, I’m gonna tell you what!
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Blues Brothers 2000’: Quotes from the movie ‘Blues Brothers 2000’