Could I trouble you for a nice warm glass of milk it helps me sleep. you could trouble me by enjoying a nice glass of shut the hell up, you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep, read the name tag you’re in my world now Grandma.
It struck my foot!!!
Its all in the hips.
#1 Can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk? It helps me get to sleep. #2 No, but you can trouble me for a glass of SHUT THE HELL UP!
#1 Can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk? It helps me get to sleep. #2 No, but you can trouble me for a glass of SHUT THE HELL UP! Check out the name tag; You’re in my world now, Grandma.
#1)Just stay out of my way… or you’ll pay. Listen to what I say. #2)How ’bout I just go eat somw hay? I can make things out of clay and lay by the bay. I just may. What do you say?
#1)You’re in bug trouble, pal. I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. #2)You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? #1)No!
#1- You’re in big trouble pal, I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! #2-You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? #1-No!
#1-I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! #2-You eat pieces of shit for breakfast!? (Pause) #1- N…No!
#1-I’d love to punch that guy in the face right now but I can’t you know or I’ll get in trouble. I’ll bet you get a lot of that on Let’s Make A Deal. #2-It’s The Price is Right, Happy. #1-Oh yeah sorry. #2-It happens. Let’s play some golf.
#1-You’re in big trouble pal, I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. #2-You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? #1-No!
#1. You can Win that Gold Jacket like i never did #2. Gold Jacket Green Jacket Who Gives a Shit
#1Could i trouble you for a glass of warm milk?#2 you could trouble me for a glass of shut the hell up. now you will go to sleep or i will put you to sleep. look at the name tag your in my world now grandma.
(1)Aww…because your black? (2)Hell NO! Damn alligator bit my hand off! (1)Oh My GOD! (2)Cut my ball down in the rim. Son of bitch just popped up. He got me but I cut one of those bastard’s eyes out! (1)Pretty sick Chubs.
(1)I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast.(2) What you eat pieces of Shit!
-can i trouble you for a nice warm glass of milk?
-you can trouble me for a nice warm glass of SHUT THE HELL UP!
-Good for you, you can count. -And you can count on me waiting for you in the parking lot!
-Happy Gilmore accomplished the feat no more than an hour ago.
-Well good for Happy Gilm-OH MY GOD!!
-Stay out of my way, or you’ll pay.Listen to what I say.
–Yeah, why don’t I go eat some hay. I can make things out of clay, or lay by the bay, I just may. Whaddya say?
1 I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. 2 You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? 1 NO!
1) But there’s a problem you’re not any good. 2) I am good, you know what ur a lousy kindergarden teacher, i see those finger paintings u bring home and they suck!
1) Could I please trouble you for a warm glass of milk? It helps me get to sleep.
2) You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut-the-hell-up. Now will go to sleep. Or i will put you to sleep. Read the name badge; you’re in my world now grandma.
1) Excuse me sir. can I trouble you for a glass of warm milk it help put me to sleep 2)You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut the hell up, now you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep check out the name tag…your in my world now grandma 3)Oh dear
1) Get off of me!2) Just easing the tension, baby. Just easing the tension!1) Well, ease it on someone else.
1) I eat little pieces of shit like you for breakfast. 2) You eat little pieces of shit for breakfast?
1) I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! 2) You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? 1) ……No!
1) i eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. 2) you eat pieces of
shit for breakfast??
1) I thought we were going to be, you know, friends. 2) What? Friends listen to Endless Love in the dark.
1) I wanted to be a football player. 2) O ya what happened? 1) Mom wouldn’t sign the permission slip, said it would be to dangerous. 2) O really good call.
1) My fingers hurt. 2) What was that? 3) My fingers hurt. 4) Well, now your back’s gonna to hurt, because you just pulled landscaping duty. Anybody else’s fingers hurt?
1) stay out of my way, or you’ll pay, listen to what i say! 2) why don’t i go eat some hay, i can make things out of clay, and lay by the bay, i just may, what do you say?
1): My fingers hurt… 2): What was that? 1): My fingers hurt… 2): Yeah? Well now you’re back’s gonna hurt ’cause you just pulled landscaping duties. Anyone else’s fingers hurt?
1)Do you always carry a puck with you? 2)Yeah!
1)Don’t mess with me, I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. 2) You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? 1)(hesitates)…N-No!!
1)Hey where are you going with those clubs, PUNK!!! (shoves him over) 2)Mr. Gilmore, I’m your caddy!!!
1)Hey where are you going? I got us Subway. 2)I already ate. 1)Yeah…well, I went to high school with a guy that worked there so I got extra meatball. 2)Great. I gotta go. 1)Hey, can you stay for a little while. I kinda had a rough day. 2)Bye. 1)When are you coming back? 2)Never! 1)Uh…
1)I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! 2)you eat shit for breakfast?
1)I thought we were gonna be just…friends. 2)What?! Friends listen to ‘endless love’ in the dark!
1)Listen up everyone, turn up your volumes, announcement. I’ve got good news. Looks like we’re extending arts and crafts time by 4 hours today. 2)My fingers hurt. 1)Whats that? 2) My fingers hurt. 1)Oh, well…now your back’s gonna hurt because you just pulled landscaping duty. Do anyone else’s fingers hurt? I didnt think so.
1)no, no, the price went up, I’m tellin’ ya! This is home made stuff! Now listen everybody! Arts and crafts has been extended by two hours today.
2)But my fingers hurt
1)well your backs gunna hurt now cuz you just pulled lawn duty. Anybody else want to volunteer?!
1)That was great! I know you are going to kick his ass. 2)Yeah, well, that makes one of us. Kay, you take Grandma home, I can walk from here. 1)Where are you going? 2)I gotta learn how to play golf.
1)That’s right I’m gonna beat your ass on the court! 2)Yeah, right. And Grizzly Adams had a beard. 3)Grizzly Adams DID have a beard!
1)That’s two Shooter. 2)o you can count. 1)And you can count on me waiting for you in the parking lot.
1)They wouldn’t let me play on the pro tour anymore. 2)Oh, because you’re black? 1)Hell no! A damn alligator bit my hand off!
1)What are you doing?! 2)Oh… I was just lookin for the rest of this bottle. There’s some!
1)You hit that guy! 2)He shouldn’t’ve been standing there.
1)You like that, old man?! You want a piece of me?! 2)I don’t want a PIECE of you…I want the WHOLE THING!!!
1)You’re going nowhere, Happy and you’re taking me with you! All you ever talk about is becoming a pro hockey player but there’s a problem–you’re not any good! 2)I AM good! You know what? You’re a lousy kindergarten teacher! I’ve seen those fingerpaintings you bring home and they SUCK!!!
1)Your a big guy why didn’t play a normal sport like football 2)My moma would sign the permission form, thought it would be to dangerous 1)yeah good call
1-I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast! 2-You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
1. A lot of pressure. You have to rise above it. Harness in the good energy, block out the bad. Harness, good. Block, bad. Feel the flow. 2. Alright, ok, thanks….Psycho
1. can i please have a glass of warm milk? It helps me go to sleep.
2. YOu can have a tall glass of shut the hell up. Now you go to sleep or I will put you to sleep.
1. Hey you know my girlfriends dead 2. really 3. yeah she fell of a cliff and died on impact
1. How about a glass of warm milk to put me to slee–2. How about a glass of shut the hell up??
1. I eat poeces of shit like you for breakfast! 2. You eat shit for breakfast????
1. I was just lookin for the rest of this bottle. Theres some. 2. Why don’t you just put the bottle down Happy. 1. Yeah I know
1. It appears your ball struck my foot, that’s two thus far 2. Oh good for you, you can count 1. And you can count… on me.. waiting for you in the parking lot.
1. Mista, Mista get this thing off of me! 2. You know that mista mista lady, i think i just killed her.
1. That’s two, thus far, Shooter. 2.(sarcastically) Well, congratulations, you can count. 1. And YOU can count…on me waiting for YOU in the parking lot!
1. Yeah, and Grizzly Adams had a beard.. 2. Grizzly Adams -did- have a beard.
1.) Hey Mister! You gotta wear a helmet!
2.) Don’t worry about it
1.)Oh yeah? Well, what’s this i hear about you breaking a rake and throwing it the woods?
2.)I didn’t break it, i was just testing its durability…and i placed it in the woods because its made of wood, and i just thought it should be in its home
1.did u break a rake and throw it in the woods? 2. no i didnt break a rake and throw it in the woods, i was testing its durability and the rake, its made of wood so i thought it wanted to be with its family
1: I’ll make you a bet. If you get this puck into that net, I’ll never bother you again. But if you miss, you have to give me a big fat kiss. And you have to pretend you like it too.
2: Do you always carry a puck with you?
1: Yeah.
[2 shoots puck and scores]
1: Holy shit. Talk about your all time back-fires.
1: Looks like a slight hill. Whaddya think?
2: And a slant to the left.
1: That’s ’cause you’re only wearing one shoe.
1: You hit that guy!! 2: He shouldn’t have been standing there.
1:dont worry ure still in good shape just remember all u gtta do is just tap it in…just tap it in. 2: just tap it in, just tap it in. give it a little tappy, tap tap taparoo
1:I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast 2: you eat pieces of shit for breakfast
364 more days to next years hockey try-outs. ohhhh, that hurt a little but i’m alright
>How about a nice warm glass of milk? >>How about a nice warm glass of SHUT THE HELL UP!
>I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. >>You eat pieces of shit?
>My fingers hurt. >>Oh, your poor fingers. Well now your BACK’S GOING TO HURT, cause you just pulled yard work.
A: Sir could I trouble you for a warm glass of milk? It helps put me to sleep. B: You can trouble me for a warm glass of SHUT THE HELL UP! Now you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep… check out the nametag. You’re in my world now grandma. A: Oh Dear!
A:I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast
B:You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
A:No
After the funeral…
Ahh, blue skies, fresh cut grass, birds chirpin. Happy: Hey what are you gonna recite me a poem or what, take it easy.
And YOU can count. On ME, waiting for YOU in the parking lot after the game!
Anybody else’s fingers hurt?
ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME?!?
Barker: i think you have had enough. no! now you have had enough . bitch
Bob B.;The price is wrong……bitch.
Can i trouble you for a nice glass of warm milk? It helps me go to sleep.-You can trouble me for a nice warm glass of shut the hell up.Now you will go to sleep or i will put you to sleep. Check out the nametag grandma, your in my world now.
can i trouble you for a warm glass of milk,,,it helps put me to sleep
You can trouble me for a warm glass of shut the hell up!!! Now you will go to sleep or i will put you to sleep, look at the nametag grandma, your in my world now
Carry On Wayward Son.
Check out the name tag; You’re in my world now, Grandma.
Chubbs: Yeah, he got me,but I tore one of that bastard’s eyes out
Happy: You’re pretty sick Chubbs
Chubs: Alright, this one’s very tough.
(Happy putts, but the Clown’s teeth block the door and laughing can be heard.)
Happy: A-ha-ha-ha! He’s laughing, having a good time. Good for you, yeah, laugh it up. Enjoy your night.
Chubs: Happy, concentrate.
(Happy putts again, and the same thing happens)
Happy: I hate that clown.
Chubs: Easy. If you can’t beat the clown, how will you beat Shooter MacGavin?
(Happy putts again, this time getting the ball in.)
Happy: Yes!
(The clown spits the ball out, and laughs)
Happy: You’re going to die clown!
(Happy runs up to the clown, and knocks his nose off with his golf club. The laughing recording slows and comes to an end.)
Happy: You think that’s funny? I don’t hear ya laughing now!
Chubs: (restraining Happy) Whoa, whoa, whoa, Enough!
Happy: What, I can’t do it!
Chubs: Come with me, Happy. Come on!
Happy: (to Clown) You suck, you stupid clown.
Circular, with the flow. All good things.
Come see if you can out-drive the amazing golf ball wacker guy.
Congratulations, murderer! You killed a golf legend.
Congratulations, you killed a golf legend.
Congratulations…murderer.
crazy lady: mister, mister, get me out of here!!
happy: (throws fries) Here just take these and leave us alone.
Damn you people…go back to your shanties.
Doin the bull dance feelin the flow
doin the bull dance makin a damn fool of yourself
Doing the bull dance, feeling the flow
Doing the bull dance, feeling the flow…working it, working it.
doing the bulldance, feeling the flow. working it, working it.
Don’t worry about your grandma, Gilmore, she can come live with me and be my maid.
dont you ever touch my puck
Dutch: So why don’t you send the military in? What do you need us for?
Dylan: Because some damn fool accused you of being the best.
Dutch: Dylan, you son of a bitch! (Dutch slaps Dylan’s hand and arm wrestles him in the air)
Dutch: What’s the matter? The CIA got you pushin’ too many pencils, huh?
Dylan: Don’t make it easy on yourself Dutch.
Endless Love.
Every in here is fucking retarded. You put in these qoutes for people to look at for entertainment purposes. I try come in here for a laught. I recognize the quotes but they are all wrong. Watch the movie and get yur shit together.
First my dad and now Chubbs. Anybody I get close to dies. If I were you I’d run.
Fuckin, shit, fuck me in the……fuck that….fuck you, you fucking stupid cup…..monkey, lickin….fucker..sh….fuck that
Get me outa here!!!!!!!!!!
gggggggggg
Girl: What’s this I hear about you breaking a rake and trowing it in the woods? Man: I didn’t break it, I was just checking it for it’s durability. Then I placed it in the woods, because it’s made of wood, and I just thought it should be with it’s family. It least I didn’t hit anybody!
go home!! ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME?!?!
Go Home!! ARE YOU TOO GOOD FOR YOUR HOME???
Go in the damn hole!!! Are you to good for your home?!?!?! Go in the hole!!!!!
Go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!!
Go to a happy place, go to a happy place
Gold jacket green jacket who gives a shit!
Gold jacket, green jacket… who gives a shit?
Golf requires goofy pants and a big ass. You should talk to my neighbor, the accountant, huge ass.
GOOD! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY LIFE, WHO NEEDS YA, BEAT IT, LEAVE ME ALONE!!
Granma:Excuse me sir, can I trouble you for a warm glass of milk. It helps
me sleep. Warden: You can trouble me for a warm glass of … SHUT THE HELL
UP! Chack the tag, your in my world now grandma.
Green jacket, gold jacket who gives a shit?
Green jacket, gold jacket, who gives a shit ?!?
Guns dont’t kill people. I kill people.
Happy learned how to putt uh oh!
HAPPY LOOK OUT! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Happy look OUTTTA……
Happy look ouutt!
Happy- Remember the gator that got your hand? Well, I got his head.
Happy-That son of a bitch!(Alligator catches ball in mouth) Gimme the ball ya dirty bastard!
Happy: Aww, Im sorry man, becuase your black?
Chubbs: No…*Suddenly pulls out wooden hand* DAMN ALLIGATOR BIT MY HAND OFF!
Happy: OH MY GOD!!!!
Happy: During high school, I played junior hockey and still hold two league records: most time spent in the penalty box; and I was the only guy to ever take off his skate and try to stab somebody.
HAPPY: Happy learned how to put…uh oh
Happy: If I saw myself dressed like that, I’d have to kick my own ass.
Happy: So what happened?
Chubs: They wouldn’t let me play on the pro tour anymore.
Happy: Oh i’m sorry, because you’re black?
Chubs: Hell no! God damn alligator bit my hand off!
Happy: Oh my god!
Chubs: Yeah, i hooked my ball down by the water, alligator came out of nowhere and took my hand, but i tore one of that bastard’s eyes out though.
Happy: Wow. You’re pretty sick Chubs.
Happy: The price is wrong, bitch.
Happy: Why because your black?Chubs: Hell no, damn alligator bit my hand off. I was in a tournament down in Florida, and I hooked my ball in the rough. Damn alligator popped up and bit my hand off. He got me. He cut me down in my prime. But I got him. I got one a that bastards eyes out. Happy: Oh my God, your a sick man Chubs.
Happy: You fuing play it where it lies!
Happy: You know my girlfriend is dead. She fell off a cliff and died on impact.
Happy:i Hate that clown
HAPPY:You must get that a lot on let’s make a deal. BOB: Its the price is right Happy. HAPPY: opps sorry
Harness energy block bad. Its like a carosel. It goes up and down, and around.
He shoots, he scores!!! Ahh man, that was so much easier than putting. I should try t’get the ball in on one shot every time.
Hes laughing hes havin a good time, laugh it up, enjoy yoiur night
Hey Gilmore, you suck you Jackass!
Hey Gramma, could i trouble you for a warm glass of shut the hell up. You’re in my world now.
Hey man, I hate to admit this but, this is my first trophy and problem is, that goofy golf guy on top. Maybe the guy at the trophy store could put a little hockey guy on there.
hey mister, mister, get this off of me!
Hey public relations lady, you seen Shooter Mcgavin? No why? No reason, I just need to beat the living piss out of him. You are right he deserves a beating. But, it you do that, I have to get up in the morning and issue a statement to why the new guy beat up Shooter Mcgavin and you’d be creating more work for me. Oh and we wouldn’t want that now would we.
Hey Shooter! You wanna go to the Sizzler and get some grub?
Hey shooter! Do ya wanna go to the sizzler, and get some grub?
HEY SHOOTER, DID YOU GET A CHANCE TO SEE HAPPY GILMORE PLAY, SORRY I WAS TO BUSY WINNING, YOU GOT TO ADMIT 450 YARDS THATS A HELL OF A DRIVE, YEAH YEAH, HOW HE DO, WHAT DID HE COME IN LAST?, OO YEAH YEAH HE HAD A GOOD DAY THOUGH.
Hey, anybody tap the keg yet? I’ll pump!
Hey, you no want breakfast?
Hey…if I saw myself in those clothes I’d have to kick my own ass.
Hi I’m a hockey player but I’m playing golf today.
Hi im a hockey player playing golf today.
hi, I’m a hockey player, but I’m playing golf today.
hju
Holy Shit that ball went 400 yards
HOW ABOUT A NICE TALL GLASS OF SHUT THE HELL UP.
I cannot believe you’re a professional golfer.
You should be working at the snack bar.
I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast.
I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. You eat pieces of shit for breakfast??
I eat s*** like you for breakfast!
You eat s*** for breakfast?
I eat shit like you for breakfast 2.You eat shit for breakfast?
i HATE that Bob Barker!
I have good news, arts and crafts time is increased by for hours today. My fingers hurt. What was that? my fingers hurt. Well, your backs gonna hurt cause you just pulled landscaping duty, anybody elses fingers hurt? I didnt think so.
I just saw two big fat naked bikers in the woods off 17 havin sex…how am i supposed to chip with that goin on!
I mean look at her, she’s old!
i saw to fat guy’s having sex in the woods on 17.
I think i killed the Meestah Meestah lady
I wanna kiss you all over, and over and again…..’til the niiiiiight closes in….
I was down on 18 the other day, looked to my left, and there was 2 fat naked bikers having sex in the woods….how am i suppose to chip with that going on greg
I was on this tour for one reason – money – but now I’ve got a new reason: kicking your ass!
I’ll be at the Red Lobster in case you change your mind!
I’ll be at the Red Loster in case you change your mind!
I’ll make you a deal. If I win I get the house back. But if you win thats it I’m done I quit. You’re gonna beat me? At golf? aHAhaa! Oh you’re on, but you’re in big trouble pal, I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? …NO
I’m the only guy to ever take of my skate and try to stab someone.
I’d love to punch that guy in the face right now but I can’t you know or I’ll get in trouble. I’ll bet you get a lot of that on Let’s Make A Deal. It’s The Price is Right, Happy. Oh yeah sorry. It happens. Let’s play some golf.
Im sry babe…I didnt mean it. Sometimes I just get so scared….scared of being a nobody.
Is this your ball? It struck my foot!
It’s all in the hips. It’s all in the hips
it’s all in the hips…
Its all in the hips
its like a carosel it goes up and down and around ……. circular…circle
just taaaap it in, just taaap it in, give it a little tappy, tap, tap, taparoo
Just taaap it in, just taaap it in, get it a little tappy, tap tap tap-a-roo
Just tap it in, just tap it in, give it a little tappy, tap tap tapparoo
Just tap it in, Just tap it in. Tap Tap Tappy. Tap Tap Tap-a-roo
Just tap it in, tap it in. give it a little tap tap tappy, tap in it, tap tap taparoo
Just tap it in. Tap, tap, tappy. Tap, tap, taparoo.
Just tap it, just tap it in, give it a little tappy, tap tap tap aroo
Larson: Thats 2 thus far Shooter
McGavin: Oh, so you’ve learned how to count
Larson: And YOU can count on ME waiting for you in the parking lot!
Look at the name tag. You’re in my world now, Grandma.
Mista!!! Mista!!! Get me outta heerrre!!
My Fingers hurt, what was that, I said My Fingers hurt, Guess What? Now your back is going to hurt because you just pulled landscaping duty, huh? does anyone else’s fingers hurt, did’nt think so.
My Girlfriends Dead you know, She fell off a a cliff
My name is happy gilmore…ever since i was old enough to skate, i loved hockey. i wasnt really the greatest skater though. but that didnt stop my dad from teaching me the secret of smacking the greates slapshot. my dad worshiped hockey…my mom didnt, thats why she moved to egypt where there’s not a hockey rink for fifteen hundred miles. dad always took me to hockey games to cheer for our favorite player, terry o riley, the tazmanian devil. he wasnt the biggest guy in the league but he feared nobody, just like me. my dad always said i could be anything i wanted when i grow up, but i didnt want to be anything but a pro hockey player. yeah my child hood was going great, but lifes full of surprises. after the funeral, i was sent to live with my grandmother in waterbury. i was kindof nervous since i didnt really know her that well. but she dressed like gene simmons from kiss to cheer me up. shes the sweetest person in the world. as a child i developed sort of a short fuse. see that kid just stole my party blower and instead of asking for it back, i felt i had to belt him in the head a bunch of times with a hammer. but…i was quick to say i was sorry. in high school i played junior league hockey and still two records, most time spent in the penalty box, and i was the only person to take off my skate and try to stab somebody. after high school ive held a lot of different jobs…i was a janitor, a gas station attendant, a security guard, and a plummer. lately ive been working construction, its not a bad racket. im a pretty good shot with the nail gun. but one day, my boss mr. larson, uh…got in the way. he got a couple lucky punches in but i still feel i won the fight.
Next to tee off: Laffertey Daniel and Gilmore…HAPPY!
Nice Distance
Now ur gonna get it Bobby
Now you will go to sleep or I will put you to sleep.
Oh I was just looking for the other half of that bottle, oh look there’s some there, and there’s some over there….
Old Lady:My fingers hurt. Nursing home man:What is that? Old Lady: My fingers hurt. Nursing home man: Oh, well now your back’s gonna hurt because you just pulled garden duty. Anyone else’s fingers hurt??
ooooooooooh! Happy learned how to putt!!
PIECE OF MONKEY SH…BEEP
Price is wrong, BITCH!!
randi = goddess #1
Remember the gator that got your hand? Well, I got his head.
See if you can out-drive the amazing golf-ball-wacker guy.
Seen on Mr. Larson’s shirt: Guns don’t kill people. I kill people.
Shooter McGavin: And Grizzly Adams had a beard. Man: Grizzly Adams did have a beard.
Shooter McGavin: Stay out of my way, or you’ll pay. Listen to what I say.
Happy Gilmore: Yeah, why don’t I go eat some hay. I can make things out of clay, or lay by the bay, I just may. Whaddya say?
Shooter- oh you can count. Mr. Larson- And you can count on me waiting for you in the parking lot!
Shooter: Just stay out of my way…or you’ll pay…listen to what I say! Happy: How ’bout I just go eat some hay? I can make things out of clay and lay by the bay, I just may? What do ya say?
Shut up happy, don’t feel bad for me i got my hand back see?
So you had a fight with a game show host on national TV. I don’t consider that entertainment. This is not hockey Mr. You Head Butted Bob Barker!
So your a hockey player huh? You gonna give that Shit up!?
So your a hockey player huh? You gonna give that Sit up!?
somebody’s closer
Somebody’s closer!!
Spoken like a true asshole!
Step right up see if you can outdrive the amazing golf-ball wacker guy
suck my white ass ball
Suck my white ass, ball!
suck my white ass, ball!!
sure happy .. i’ll take care of grandma. She can be my maid
Terry: All you ever talk about is becoming a pro hockey player, but there’s a problem: you’re not any good!
Happy Gilmore: I am good! You know what, you’re a lousy kindergarten teacher! I’ve seen those fingerpaintings you bring home and they SUCK!
Terry: You’re going nowhere Happy, and you’re taking me with you. All you ever talked about was being a pro hockey player, but there’s a problem: you’re not any good!
Happy: I am good! You know what, you’re a lousy kindergarten teacher! I’ve seen those fingerpaintings you bring home and they SUCK!
That’s two thus far.
Thats my puck baby! Don’t you ever touch my puck!
the amazing golf ball whacker guy
The Gold Jacket’s yours Happy. Shouters gonna choke!
The price is wrong Bitch
The price is wrong BITCH!
The price is wrong Bitch.
The price is wrong bitch….
The price is WRONG Bob!
The Price is wrong, bitch!
The price is wrong, bitch!!
Think of your happy place……..
This guy SUCKS!
This is handmade quality shit we’re talkin here.
To be a golfer you gotta have goofy pants and a fat ass. You should talk to my neighbor, probably a great golfer, huge ass.
Uh-Oh. Somebody’s been practicing.
uhoh Happy learned how to putt!!
ur gonna die clown!!!
Virginia: What’s this about you breaking a rake and throwing it in the woods?
Happy: I didn’t *break* it, I was merely testing its durability, and I *placed* it in the woods cause it’s made of wood and I wanted it to be near its family.
wait for it….wait for it….now!
well good for happy-ohmygod
Well I here the Asteroids Machine calling my name from the game room
Well now your back’s going to hurt, cause you just pulled landscaping duty. Anyone else’s fingers hurt? I didn’t think so.
Well now your backs gonna hurt cuz you just pulled landscaping duty. Anyone else’s fingers hurt? I didnt think so.
What a shot by… Happy Gilmore?!Who the hell is Happy Gilmore>
What’s this I hear about you breaking a rake and throwing it in the woods?!
Whhhhhaaattttt..I didnt break it, i was just testing its durability…and then i placed it in the woods because its made of wood and i just thought it should be with its family.
WHAT? Friends listen to endless love in the dark!
What? You no want breakfast?
What?! Friends sing Endless Love in the dark…
Where were you on that one d*ckhead?
Where were you on that one dipshit?
Where were you on that one, dipshit?
Where’s that nice girlfriend of yours? Oh, she’s dead. She fell off a cliff and died on impact.
Who said that friends don’t dance to Endless Love in the dark?
Who’s got the keg? I’ll pump!
why didn’t you just go home, that’syour home, are you too good for your home.
Why don’t you shut the hell up.
why dont i give you a spoon, so you can eat my ass
Will you be attempting to reach the green from here? Thats impossible. Oh I beg to differ. Mr. Gilmour accomplished that feat no more than an hour ago. Well moron good for Happy Gilmo-OH MY GOD!
yeah a lotta cameras a lotta pressure. you gotta harness in the good energy; block out the bad. harness: energy, block: bad. you gotta feel the flow happy; feel it. its like a carousell: you pay the quarter, you get on the horse, you go up and down and around. circular. circle. the flow. feel it
Yeah, bring that Shit on!!
you can count on me waiting for you in the parking lot
You can trouble me for a glass of ‘shut the hell up’. You will shut up or I will shut you up. You’re in my world now grandma.
you can trouble me for a glass of shut the hell up!!
You can trouble me for a warm glass of why don’t you shut the hell up! Now you will go to sleep, or I will put you to sleep. You see this? You’re in my world now, Grandma…
You eat pieces of shit for breakfast?
you eat shit for breakfast?
YOU JACKASS!!!!!!!!!!
You know my girlfriend is dead. She fell off a cliff and died on impact.
You know that mista mista lady?… I think I just killed her…
You know that mister mister lady? Well, I think I just killed her.
you know that Mister, Mister lady I think I just killed her.
You know the alligator who got your hand? Well, I got its head!!
You know the gator that got your hand? Well I got its head.
You know the mista, mista lady? …. I think I just killed her!
You know, the real winner here is the city of Portland. Every time I come here it gets harder and harder to leave. it must be something you put in the water.
you no want breakfast
You spend more time in the sand than David Hasselhof.
You suck you…..jackass
you think your better that meeeee?
you will not make this put you jackass
You will not make this put, you jackass.
You will not make this putt, you jackass! (Laughing)
you will not make this putt…jackass
You will not pass go, you will not collect two hundred, YOU WILL GO IN THAT HOLE !
You’re gonna die clown
You’re gonna miss this shot, jackass!
you’re gonna need a blanket and a bottle of suntan lotion because your never gonna get out of there just like you never got into the NHL you jackass!
You’re like a freak, how often do you play?
your gonna need a towel and some suntan lotion cuz your never gonna get off that beach just like you never got into the NHL
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Happy Gilmore’: Quotes from the movie ‘Happy Gilmore’