KEITH
It is easier to be killed by a
terrorist after the age of 40
than it is to get married —
ANNIE
That is not true. That
statistic is not true.
BECKY
It’s not true, but it feels
true.
Keith
It feels true because it is true.
If someone is a widower, why do
they say he was widowed? Why
don’t they say he was widowered?
Listen to this. Phone service
in the greater Chicago area was
tied up for two hours Christmas
Eve because some kid called a
phone-in radio show to get a wife for
his father. Two thousand women
called in for the number.
Hi, Victoria?… It’s Sam
Baldwin, I don’t know if you
remember me. Oh? Well, great.
I was wondering if you uh…if you wanted
to have a drink with me… Uh dinner? Dinner is even better! How..how…Friday will be fine…I..I..I hear that’s a great place…uh what…okay, seven o’clock…and uh… I’ll meet you there. So, it’s Friday, seven o’clock, for dinner…great…yeah, me too!
#1 I don’t care what you do! #2 Good! Fine! (Mumbles) I’ll tell you what I’m going to do this weekend, I’m getting laid. 1990’s nobody is getting laid. I’m the only man in America that’s getting laid this weekend. And I haven’t been getting laid that much…six girls in college maybe seven. How long have you been standing there? #1 Forever. #2 What did you here me just say? #1 Six girls in college maybe seven. #2 Seven… EIGHT! Mary Kelly!
#1 This is the one I like!
#1 It is easier to be killed by a terrorist than to find a husband after the age of 40. #2 That is absolutely untrue!
#1 M.F.E.O.? #2 Made For Each Other #1 It’s cute. It’s like a clue.
#1 What do they call that, when everything intersects? #2 The Bermuda Triangle.
#1 Why can’t we go to New York? #2 There is no way we are going on a plane to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick lunatic. Didn’t you see Fatal Attraction? #1 You wouldn’t let me. #2 Well I saw it, and it scared the shit outta me. It scared the shit out of every man in America!
#1 You know that dream when you’re walking down the street naked and everyone is looking at you? #2 I love that dream.
#1. Tiramisu. #2. What’s that? #1. You’ll find out. #2. Some woman is going to want me to do that to her, and I don’t even know what it is! #1. You’ll LOVE it!
‘Dear Sleepless in Seattle.
You are the most attractive man
I’ve ever laid ears on.’
(1) Ny. (2) What’s that? (3)NO Way. (2) That’s NW (1) New York, he’s on his way to New York
(1)I have a picture of her! The detective from Seattle sent me a picture of her! Here! Here’s what she looks like! (2) This is a picture of the back of somebody’s head…
(ANNIE) Actually, he sounded nice.
(BECKY)
Oh? Oh, really? Now we’re
getting down to it.
(ANNIE) Oh Becky please! I’m totally in-love with Walter. He did the funniest thing the other day, what was it? Oh, we were hysterical…what was it…..? Hmm…..
(ANNIE) Walter I don’t deserve you (WALTER) Nah, I wouldn’t put it that way. But….okay.
(BARBARA) Oh, honey, I feel terrible, we
used up this magnum of
champagne we were saving on
something else, what did we use
it for?
(TOM)
Uncle Milton’s parole —
(JESSICA) It’s Y.O.H! (JONAH) yeah…..was that? (JESSICA) your only hope.
(MOM) Jessica, you have to tell us where he is. Jonah’s dad is very upset… (DAD) Jessica, this is your father! Tell us where he is! (JESSICA) N…Y… (SAM) What is that? (DAD) No Way (SAM) That’s N W! (JESSICA) New York, he’s on his way to New York.
(SAM) No, not dinner necessarily on
the first date because by the
time you’re halfway through
dinner you might be sorry you
asked them to dinner whereas if
it’s just a drink, if you like
them you can always ask them
for dinner…you see what I
mean.
I wonder if it still works this
way.
(JONAH)
It doesn’t. They ask you.
(SAM)
I’m starting to notice that.
– Talk to her dad she’s a Doctor
– Of what? Her first name could be Doctor
…then he held my hand…at one point I looked down and couldn’t tell which fingers were his and which were mine. And I knew. Ya know? Magic. It was magic…I knew we’d be together forever and that everything would be wonderful.
…then he held my hand…at one point I looked down and couldn’t tell which fingers were his and which were mine. And I knew. Ya know? Magic. It was magic…I knew we’d be together forever and that everything would be wonderful… :o)
1 – That’s what she called him on the show. Because he can’t sleep. 2 – And now 2,000 women want his number. The guy could be a crackhead, a psychopath, a flasher, a junkie, a transvestite, a chain-saw murderer, or someone really sick, someone like my Rick.
1) Dad, can we go to New York City for Valentines day? 2)What?! 1) Annie Reed from Baltimore wants to meet us on top of the Empire State Building on Valentines day. Jessica’s parents are travel agents, and Jessica said that if we book early we could- 2) Jonah…have you fallen down? Are you bleeding from the head? Is Clarrisse there, has she been strangled? 1) No. 2) So this is your ONLY reason for your phone call?
1) Did you see Fatal Attraction? 2) You wouldn’t let me! 1)Good, it scared the shit outta me-it scared the shit outta every man in this country!
1) Didn’t you see Fatal Attraction 2) No, you wouldn’t let me 3) Well I did and it scared the hell out of me. It scared the hell out of every man in America!
1) Every time I come close to
orgasm he stops and goes to
make himself a sandwich —
2)
Why don’t you make him a
sandwich beforehand?
1) I thought I saw a Black Widder spider! 2) Jesus, you scared me to death! You scared Victoria to death! ….The next time you see a Black Widder spider you say, ‘dad, excuse me, but I believe a poisonous insect is in the house’. And then I would calmly come and take care of it. You scream like that again, I’ll kill you…
1) I’m in love with you 2) Snap out of it
1) I’m not asking you to set me
up, Jay. That’s not what I
need your help for. I want to
know what it’s like over there.
2)
And that’s what I’m trying to
tell you. What women are
looking over, okay? Pecs and a
cute butt.
1) It rains nine months out of the year in Seattle. 2) I KNOW!
1) One of the things I truly knew
was that your father and I were
going to have a wonderful time
… in the sack I believe you
call it —
2) Mom!!
1) Sam, I heard you on the radio! I was brushing my teeth and then suddenly there you were! I called my mother in Las Vegas and said, ‘mother, turn on the radio that is my architect’. You know it is so nice when a man can express his feelings…
1) Sleepless in Seattle? 2) That’s what she called him because he can’t sleep.
1) You mean, like, ‘He has the
cutest butt’? Where did I hear
that recently?
2)
Everywhere. You can’t even
turn on the news without
hearing about how some babe
thought some guy’s butt was
cute. Who the first babe to
say this was I don’t know,
but it caught on.
1)(to himself) yeah, I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do…I’m gonna get laid. 6 girls in college maybe 7… (his son walks in)…Oh yeah, I’m getting laid–how long have you been standing there? 2)Forever! 1)What did I just say? 2)6 girls in college maybe 7. 1)Yeah, 7. EIGHT!!! Mary Kelly!
1)Dad, this is amazing. If you play this backwards it says ‘Paul is dead’. 2)Uh…yeah. I know. 1)How do you know?
1)Do you know where Oklahoma is? 2)Somewhere in the middle?
1)I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! 2)That’s good! You’ll have a lot to tell Oprah! How your dad ruined your life because he had to go away on a weekend special at the Holiday Inn!
1)MFOE? 2) Made for each other. 1) It’s cute. It’s like a litte clue.
1)Oh, it’s like that movie! 2)What movie? 1)An Affair to Remember! Did you see it? Oh, my GOD! Cary Grant and Deborah Carr–is it Carr or Kerr? (At the same time) 3)Kerr 4)Carr
1)She was sure it was rick she was completly histarical and it ended up that the guy lived in Daloof..where is Daloof? 2)That doesn’t make any sence 1)I know Walter it doesn’t make any sense thank God my life is in place 2)….Daloof that’s in North Dakota!
1)There is no way we’re going to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick lunitic! Didn’t you see Fatal Attraction? 2)You wouldn’t let me! 1)Well, I saw it! It scared the shit out of me! It scared the shit out of every man in America!
1)Tiramasu. 2)What is Tiramasu? 1)You’ll find out. 2)Well, what is it? 1)You’ll see. 2)Some woman is gonna want me to do it to her and I’m not going to know what it is. 1)You’ll love it.
1)What’s wrong with Annie? 2)Oh, Jonah, SHUT UP! 1)Shut up? Shut up?! Mom never said shut up to me! Mom never yelled at me! 2)This conversation is finished.
1)You know that dream when you’re walking down the street naked and everybody’s staring at you? 2)I love that dream.
1)You saw her in the airport and then here? 2)It was like I knew her or something. It was weird. 3)Kinda like a deja vou thing? 2)Yes, a very French deja vou. Qui.
1. Six girls in college maybe seven. What did you hear me just say? 2. Six girls in college maybe seven. 1. EIGHT! Mary Kelly.
1. Jessica says you and Annie knew each other in another life, only you never got together in that life, and she says your hearts like puzzles with missing pieces and when you’re together the puzzle’s complete. The reason i know this and you don’t, is cuz I’m younger and purer and more in touch with cosmic forces. 2. Who told you this stuff?? 1. Jessica. 2. Well I seriously hope you’re not marrying Jessica.
1. There is no way, we are going on a plane, to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick, lunatic. Didn’t you see Fatal Attraction?? 2. You wouldn’t let me!! 1. Well, I saw it!! And it scared the shit out of me, it scared the shit out of every man in America!!
1.Did you see Fatal Attraction? 2.You wouldn’t let me! 1.Well, I did, and it scared the shit out me, it scared the shit out of every man in America!
1] Do you have kids? 2] No 1] Do you want mine?
1] He’s 8. 2]He’s good at it.
1] Tell me what was so special about your wife. 2]How long is your program?
Annie Reed: Now that was when people KNEW how to be in love. They knew it! Time, distance… nothing could separate them because they knew. It was right. It was real. It was…
Becky: A movie! That’s your problem! You don’t want to be in love. You want to be in love in a movie.
Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: People who truly loved once are far more likely to love again. Sam, do you think there’s someone out there you could love as much as your wife?
Sam Baldwin: Well, Dr. Marcia Fieldstone, that’s hard to imagine.
Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: What are you going to do?
Sam Baldwin: Well, I’m gonna get out of bed every morning… breath in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breath in and out… and, then after a while, I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.
Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: Tell me what was so special about your wife?
Sam Baldwin: Well, how long is your program? Well, it was a million tiny little things that, when you added them all up, they meant we were suppose to be together… and I knew it. I knew it the very first time I touched her. It was like coming home… only to no home I’d ever known… I was just taking her hand to to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like… magic.
Jessica: I am telling them you’re twelve so you can fly unaccompanied and the stewardess won’t carry you around and stuff like that.
Jonah: Are you crazy! Who’d believe I’m twelve?
Jessica: If it’s in the computer, they believe anything.
Jonah: Are you sure?
Jessica: Do you want me to say that you are really really short for your age and they shouldn’t say anything because it would hurt your feelings.
Jonah: Yea, that’s a great idea!
A ‘hoe’! A ‘hoe’! My dad is kissing a ‘hoe’!
A wink and a smile.
Although I cried at the end of ‘The Dirty Dozen.’
And it was like… magic.
and it was like….magic…
And now 2,000 women want his
number. The guy could be a
crackhead, a psychopath, a
flasher, a junkie, a
transvestite, a chain-saw
murderer, or someone really
sick, like Rick.
Annie Reed: When a man is a widower why do we say he was widowed? Why don’t we say he was widowered?
Are you Annie?
Bees. I’m allergic to bees.
Betsy said we had to break up or get married….so we got married.
Can I get a bottle of…Dom DeLouise?
Destiny is something we’ve invented because we can’t accept the fact that everything that happens is accidental. -Annie
Destiny is something we’ve invented because we can’t stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental
Destiny is something we’ve invented because we can’t stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental.
destiny is something we’ve invented because we can’t stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental.
Doctor Marcia.
dont you remember new york?
H & G…….hi and goodbye.
He asked me to take a midnight walk on the steel pier…then he held my hand. At one point I looked down and I couldn’t tell which fingers were his and which were mine…and I knew…you know…magic! It was magic.
Hello Diane, Take a Look at these Swatches!
HEY! Diane take a look at these swatches!
HEY! Diane, take a look at these swatches!
I don’t even know him…I’m harvesting all these fantasies about some man I’ve never even met…who lives in Seattle.
I knew it the first time I saw her. It was like coming home, only to no home I’d ever known. I was just taking her hand to help her out of a car and I knew. It was…magic.
I knew it! Miss Scarlet in the broom closet with the radio!
I miss you so much it hurts
I miss you so much it hurts.
I’ll show you a sign. Here’s a sign. Alright. Where is Seattle? Right. Where is Baltimore? Thaaaaat’s right! There. Look, one, two, three, four, there’s like twenty-six states between here and there. Now that’s a sign!
I’m not allergic to Salmon! I don’t think….you never know…
I’m not even gonna think about what they’re not teaching you in school. I’m not even gonna think about it.
I’m only going to be away for one night. So you’ll have plenty of time to watch Geraldo, Nightmare on Elm
Street 12, I’ll never know.
In the wee hours of the morning.
It rains nine months a year in Seattle.
It rains nine months out of a year in Seattle
It was like coming home, only to no home I’ve ever known.
It was like coming home… only to no home I’d ever known… I was just taking her hand to to help her out of a car and I knew. It was like… magic.
It’s cute…its like a little clue. So he can’t write? Big deal! Verbal ability is a highly overrated thing in a guy, and our pathetic need for it, is what gets us into so much trouble
It’s not for me. It’s for my dad. I think he needs a new wife.
Jay: Gunga Din is not a, a swatch kind of movie.
Jay: Well, this is fate! She’s divorced, we don’t want to redo the cabinets, and you need a wife. What do they call it when everything intersects?
Sam: The Bermuda Triangle.
Jonah Baldwin: Talk to her, dad. She’s a doctor.
Sam Baldwin: Of what? Her first name could be Doctor.
Jonah Baldwin: Thanks for dinner. I’ver never seen potatoes cooked like that before.
Jonah, have you fallen down? Are you bleeding from the head? Is Clarisse there, has she been strangled?
Jonah: I guess that if you get a new wife you’re gonna have sex with her, right? Sam: Well I sure hope so Jonah: Is she gonna scratch up your back? Sam: Where did you learn that? Jonah: Jett has cable Sam: Oh, Jett has cable
Jonah: Talk to her, dad. She’s a doctor.
Sam: Of what? Her first name could be Doctor.
Listen to this. The phone service in the greater Chicago area was tied up 2 hours on Christmas eve.
Maggie: What did I used to say? Here’s mud in your eye?
Sam: Here’s to us. You used to say here’s to us.
Marriage is hard enough without bringing such low expections into it.
MEG RYAN: remember that dream when your walking down the street naked ROSIE: i love that dream MEG RYAN: it was kinda like that
Mr Zero Knew
MR. ZERO KNEW WAS IN WHEN HARRY MET SALLY
No real change…a new city. Some place where every time I go around the corner I don’t think of Maggie.
Not this one…this woman looks like my 4th grade teacher…wait…it IS my 4th grade teacher
Now he’s kissing her on the lips. She’s a ho! My Dad has been captured by a ho! What am I going to do?
Okay, they were supposed to have met on top of the Empire State Building only she gets hit by a taxi and never shows up and he waits and waits for her…. and she’s too proud to tell him that she’s….um…crippled…and he’s too mad to wonder why she doesn’t come. But oh, I forget why but oh….it’s amazing when he finally comes to see her. She sees him and doesn’t say a word…and oh, he’s very bitter. And you’d think that he’s just gonna walk away without knowing why….she’s just lying there with a…blanket over her shriveled little legs…..but then, he looks at the painting and he goes to the bedroom and….they know…and then they hug and it’s so….ohohohohoho….
She could peel an apple in one long strand.
She laughs like a Hyenna
She made everything beautiful.
She’s a ho! My Dad’s been captured by a ho!
Shut up, shut up, mom never said shut up!
Shut up?! Shut up?! Mom never told me to shut up!
Silly really, I’ve seen him at the office, of course I’ve seen him he’s the publishing editor…and one day we ordered sandwiches from the same deli and he got my lettuce and tomato on wheat, which of course he was allergic to…and I got his lettuce on tomato on white.
So he can’t write. Big deal. Verbal ability is a highly overrrated thing in a guy, and our pathetic need for it is what gets us in so much trouble.
THAT SOUNDS LIKE A CHICK MOVIE TO ME
The reason I know this and you don’t is because I’m younger and purer and more in touch with cosmic sources. -Jonah
There is it. Whate are you gonna do when you get up there? Spit off the top?
There is no way we are going on a plane to meet some woman who could be a crazy sick lunitic! Didn’t you see FATAL ATTRACTION?
There it is. The Empire State Building. What are you gonna do when you get up there? Spit off the top?
This is what single people do. They try other people on and see how they fit.
Time, distance, nothing could separate them because they knew. it was right. it was real.
Verbal ability is a highly overrated thing in a guy, and it’s our pathetic need for it that gets us into so much trouble.
Walter: I love you… but let’s leave that out of this.
Well, I’m gonna get out of bed every morning… breath in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breath in and out… and, then after a while, I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.
Well, I’m gonna get out of bed every morning… breathe in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breathe in and out… and, then after a while, I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.
What did I used to say? Here’s looking at you?
Here’s to us..you used to say here’s to us.
What if someone you never met, someone you never saw, someone you never knew was the only someone for you?
What if this man is my destiny and I never meet him?
When a man is a widower why do we say he was widowed? Why don’t we say he was widowered?
When a man is a widower why do we say he was widowed? Why don’t we say he was widowered? I was just wondering.
when you meet someone and you’re attracted to them, it just means that your subconscious is attracted to their subconscious, subconsciously. so what we think of as chemistry is just two neuroses knowing that they are a perfect match.
When you think are attracted to someone its just your subconscious attracted to their subconscious…subconsciously.
Winter must be cold for those who have no warm memories…we’ve already missed the spring.
Winter must be cold for those with no warm memories.
Yes, Well – We’re rice men.
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Sleepless in Seattle’: Quotes from the movie ‘Sleepless in Seattle’