Do you know what Nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by a horrible cunt…me.
it’s not ‘audible count’ or ‘horrible count’, it’s ‘HORRIBLE CUNT’
(1)-I don’t wanna go in there. You’ll never see me again.
(2)-Well we won’t if you don’t…okay, look, you give me the stone, and I will give it to Bricktop.
(1)-All right. Give me a minute. It’s a bit fiddly.
(2)-What’s it doin’ in there?
(1)-Well I put in there in case we got mugged.
(2)-You ain’t from this planet, are you Vincent? Who is gonna mug two black fellas, holdin’ pistols, sittin’ in a car that’s worth less than your shirt?
(1)-Bullet-tooth Tony and his friend, Desert Eagle .50.
(2)-What have they got to do with it?
(1)-They’re both starin’ straight at me.
(3)-You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity. Now get outta the car, and leave your water pistols behind.
(1)What the fuck did you do that for? (2)WELL, YOU WANTED TO KNOW IF THEY WORKED! (1) I didn’t mean for you to fucking go and shoot them in the car!
(After Tyrone hits the car) Vincent:A natural fucking idiot, what have you done Tyrone? Sol: Yeah Tyrone what HAVE you done? Tyrone: I didn’t see it. Vincent: It’s a four ton truck Tryone, not a pack of fucking peanuts now is it. Tryone: It was a funny angle. Vincent: When you reverse Tryone, things come from behind ya.
(Bullet Tooth Tony)-the fact that your guns say REPLICA down the side and the fact that mine says, DESERT EAGLE .50 should precipitate your balls shrinking along with your presense!!!!
(scottish accent) Save your breath for cooling your porridge
-Tommy: Who took the jam outta your donut?
-Turkish: You took the fucking jam outta my donut Tommy, you did!
-This is a piker camp site!
-Ten points!
-What the fuck are you doing here?
-It’s a free country isn’t it?
-Well it’s not a free shop! Now fuck off!
-Whatcha got in the car?
-Seats and a steering wheel.
-You must be the big dick, and the men on either side of you are your balls. Now there are two types of balls. There are big, brave balls, and there are little, mincy, faggot balls.
-These are your last words, so make ’em a prayer.
-Now dicks have drive and clarity of vision. They aren’t clever. They smell pussy, and want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good ol’ pussy, and brought your two little, mincy, faggot balls along for a good ol’ time. But you’ve got your parties muttled up. No pussy here. Just a dose that will make you wish you born a woman. Like a prick, you’re having second thoughts. You’re shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you’ve got replica written down the side of your gun, and the fact that I’ve got Desert Eagle .50 written down the side of mine should precipitate your balls into shrinkin’ along with your presence. Now, fuck off.
….SOLE! I thought you said he was the get away driver?
WHAT THE FUCK can he get away from?
1# This, is a gun Solomon.
2# It is a fucking anti-aircraft gun Vincent.
1) A bookies got blagged last night.
2) Blagged? Speak English to me Tony. I thought this country spawned the fucking language and so far no one seems to speak it.
1) Anything to declare?
2) Yea, don’t go to England.
1) I ain’t fucking buying that.
2) Well thats handy because I ain’t fucking selling it
1) I reckon the hare gets fucked
2) What? proper fucked?
1) Is he allowed to do that?
2) Its an unlicensed boxing match. Not a tickling competition. These lads are out to hurt each other.
1) So what should I call you? Bullet? Tooth?
2) You can call me Susan if you want.
1) What is a gun doing in your trousers?
2) For protection.
1) Protection from what? Ze Germans?
1) Why do they call him the bullet dodger?
2) because he dodges bullets, Avi.
1)Boris the Blade? As in Boris the Bullet-Dodger?
2)Why do they call him the Bullet-Dodger?
1)’Cause he dodges bullets, Avi.
1)Why? What’s the matter with this one?
2)[door breaks off while trying to open] Oh nothing, it’s tip top, I just don’t like the color.
1- you like dags? 2- what 1- you like dags?
1. I fucking hate Pikey’s!
1: Do you like dags? 2: Dags? Oh Dogs? 1: Yeah dags? 1: Yeah I like dags, I like caravans better though!
1: it’s a 2 ton truck tyrone, it’s not as though it’s a packet of fuckin peanuts is it? 2: it was at a funny angle. 1: it’s behind you, when you reverse things come from behind you.
1: Why do they call him Boris the Bullet Dodger? 2: Because he dodges bullets.
1:Fuck me Tommy, that’s a gun in your trousers. What’s a gun doin in your trousers? 2: It’s protection. 1: Protection from who? Zee Germans.
1> True, but you’re a bad boy yardie, and bad boy yardies are supposed to know how to dispose of bodies 2> I create the bodys, not erase the bodies.
1> who was it 2> b-boris 1> boris… the bullet dodger 2> yah! 3> why do they call him the bullet dodger? 1> because he dodges bullets, Avi
1>…because your a Bad Boy Yardie and Bad Boy Yardie are supposed to know how to get rid of bodies.
2>I create the bodies, I don’t get rid of the bodies.
86 Carats.
Where?
London.
London?
Yes, London.
London?
Yes, London! You know, fish, chips, cup o’ tea, bad food, worse weather, Marry fuckin’ Poppins!
Bricktop:I want to use the pikey. Turkish:All right. Of course. Bricktop:Of course, fucking of course! I wasn’t asking, I was telling!
Tommy:What? You saying I can’t shoot? Turkish:Oh, no, Tommy…I wasn’t saying you can’t shoot. I KNOW you can’t shoot.
can u tell me what a dead man with an arm missing is doing in your boot, is that a tea cossie on his head
a heavy gun is realiable. if it doesnt work, you can always hit them with it.
A pint of the black stuff
All Bets Are Off
All bets, are off.
and who would that be tommy, ze Germans?
Anything to declare? Yeah don’t go to England!
Are you using dog shit for toothpaste mullet?
Avi!
Shut up and sit down you big bald fuck!
Avi! Sit down and shut up u big bald fuck! I dont like leavin my own country atleast not for anything less than warm sandy beaches with little straw hats! We have warm sandy beaches. Yeah well who the fuck wants to see ’em.
AVI….sit down you big balled fuck!
AVI: How do you want to get rid of him?
TONY: Well, do you want to shoot him?
AVI: That’s a little noisy, isn’t it?
TONY: Well, do you want to stab him?
AVI: That’s a little cold blooded, isn’t it?
TONY: Do you want to kill him or not?
HIT MAN: I’ll cut him, I’ve got a blade.
AVI: Yeah, that’s the spirit.
AVI: I’m getting heartburn. Tony, do something terrible.
AVI: Open the dog up. TONY: What? It’s not like its a tin of fucking baked beans Avi.
Avi: so…what should I call you? Bullet?Tooth?
Bullet thooth Tony:Call me susan if it makes you happy.
AVI:why do they call him the bullet-dodger??TONY:because he DODGES BULLETS,Avi!!!!
Be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm
best fuck of while ya still got the legs to carry ya
Bet you can box a little,can’t ya sir, Aye, you look like a boxer!
BONJOUR!
Boris, Franky fucking Four Fingers has a diamond the size of a fist. I sent him to you to buy a gun. What else do you want me to do? Hit him for you? But don’t you hit him either! Americans can’t know it was Russian.
Brick Top, etc: tyrone…you silly fat bastard
Brick Top: Do You Know What Nemesis Means?
A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an approriate agent personified in this instance by an ‘Orrible Cunt, Me!
BRICK TOP: Youre a ruthless little cunt Liam Ill give you that. But Ive got no time for grasses, feed im to the pigs boys….. What the fuck are you two looking at?
Bricktop: theres a campsite full of pikeys
who might not think you’re so fuckin funny
…. not when theyre putting out the flames
out on their childrens backs!!
BRICKTOP: Do you know what nemesis means? A rightous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by a ‘orrible cunt…me
BRICKTOP: In the quiet words of the virgin mary…..come again?
BRICKTOP: Youre a ruthless little cant Liam, Ill give ya that…. But Ive got no time for grasses, feed him to the pigs boys. What the fuck are you two lookin at?
BRICKTOP:Do you know these tits,Errol?
ERROL:I know a lot of tits….but I don’t know any as fuckin stupid as these two….
BRICKTOP:I don’t care if he is Muhammad-I’m hard-Bruce Lee!
BRICKTOP:You’re walkin on thin-fuckin-ice, my pedigree chums.And I shall be under it when it breaks.Now,Fuck off.
Bullet thoot Tony tries to shoot Tyrone but he’s out of bullets: ‘well, arent’t you a lucky motherfucker!’
Bullet Tooth Tony: Boris the Blade? As in Boris the Bullet-Dodger? Cousin Avi: Why do they call him the Bullet-Dodger? Bullet Tooth Tony: ‘Cause he dodges bullets, Avi.
But this time I do want him to go down in the fourth. And I do mean it this time.
Customs Official- Anything to declare?
Avi- Yeah, don’t go to England.
cuz that’s not incon-fuckin-spicuous
D’ya like dags?
Dags…whats a dag? Ohhhh, dogs! Sure I like dogs…I like
caravans better.
Dags? Oh, DOGS. Sure, I like dags…I like caravans more.
Deadly kick for a fat fucka.
deal was you bought it how you saw it. now look, i’ve helped you as much as i’m gonna help you, you see that car? i suggest you use it while you still got the legs to carry you.
do you know what a nemisiss is
Do you know what mnemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by a horrible cunt. Me!
Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution
manifested by an appropriate agent.
Do you know what nemesis means? It is a righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by an audible count, ME.
Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous act of retribution manifested by an appropraite agent. Personified in this case by a ‘orrible cunt, Me. -Bricktop
Do you know what Nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by an horrible count…me.
Do you know what Nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent, personified in this case by an horrible cunt…me.
Do you know what nemesis means? A righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent. Personified in this case by an ‘orrible cunt… me!
DO YOU KNOW WHAT NEMISES MEANS
do you know what nemisis means ?? a righteous infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent…personified in this case by a horrible c*nt…..ME !………….jamie
do you know what nemisis means? a ritious infliction of retribution manifested by an appropriate agent personified in this case by a horrible cunt .. me!
Do you know why they call him Frankie Four Fingers Doug?
Cuz he makes STUPID bets with STUPID people
and when he cant pay up,
they give him the CHOP Doug,
and im not talking about his fuckin foreskin either.
Does your little lady friend have something to say?
Don’t worry bout him, you just worry bout getting us a gun. Oh I’ve got a gun Sol. Thats a fucking anti-aircraft gun Vincent. Well I wanna raise some pulses tonite dun I? You’ll raise Hell nevermind pulses.
Doug the Head :What the fuck are you doing here ?
Kid : It is a free country innit ?
Doug the Head : Well, it ain t a free shop, is it ? So, FUCK OFF !
Doug the Head- Avi!
Cousin Avi- Sit down you big bald fuck.
Doug the Head: Avi!
Cousin Avi: Shut up and sit down you big-balled fuck!
Doug: Avi!!!
Avi: Sit down and shut-up you big bald fuck
Doug: What You Think Your Doin?
Jew: Well Its A Free Country Innit?
Doug: Well It Aint A Free Shop Is It??…… So Fuck Off!
Drivin’ down the road with your head stuck in me winda.
Drop the case, or I shoot
Drop the gun, Fat Boy
Drop ze gun fat boy.
errol: Calm down son, behave yourself. Tommy: i’m the one whos got the gun son, i think it’s you who should behave yourself
Errol: He’s pissed in my fuckin pocket. Bricktop: Tony, ain’t you house trained?
Errol: we’re in govner. Bricktop: goody gum drops
ERROL:Oink,Oink!…So,that’s where you keep the sugar!!
Ever cross the road and looked the wrong way ? Then hey, presto there’s a car nearly on you ? So what do you do ?Something very silly .You freeze and your life doesn’t flash before your eyes cuz your too fucking scared . You just freeze and pull a stupid face.
Find my friend a nice Jewish doctor!
For every action there is a reaction.. and a pikey reaction is quite a fucking thing.
For every action, there is a reaction. And a Pikey reaction… is quite a fucking thing.
For what, Tommy? Ze Russians?
Franky 4 Fingers-Vere is ze stone? MAN SHOUTS Franky-Vere is ze stoone?
Franky4Fingers:I am not in Rome, Doug, I am in a rush.
Fuck me,look at the size of him!HOw big are you?How big is he boys?
FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!!!!! EAT A DICK, EAT UR MOMS FOR ALL I FUCKIN CARE, JUST GET A FUCKIN LIFE ALL U MOTHER FUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!
Get yer tounge out of my arse Erol. Dogs do that. Your not a dog are you Erol.
Give me the diamond
I put it back in the suitcase.
Well then, open the briefcase.
I can’t.
Why not?
Because the only man who knew the combination, you just shot.
give us the blower, will you susan?
Go and put the kettle on.
Do you take sugar?
No thanks Turkish. I’m sweet enough.
Gorgeous George: Offa pack of fuckin pykies? Whats wrong wi you!? This….will get messy.
Gorjous George- this is sick, im outa here!
Mickey- your not goin anywher…(takes of top)… you stat till your job is done!(gorgous swings for Mickey. Mickey counters the hit and knocks Gorgous out)
GROUP OF TEENAGERS: It’s a free country isn’t it? DOUG THE HEAD: But it ain’t a free shop is it? so fuck off!
HAROLD:he wasn’t talking to you fuck face. TURKISH:fuck face well thats a good one Harold I’ll have to remember that one the next time I’m crawling off our mom.
HAROLD:he wasn’t talking to you fuck face. TURKISH:fuck face well thats a good one Harold I’ll have to remember that one the next time I’m crawling off your mom.
He tells people he’s Jewish, he wishes he was Jewish, he even tells his family they’re Jewish. But he’s about as Jewish as he is a friggin’ monkey.
He’s about as jewish as he is a monkey
He’s got as many of THESE nuts and he’s got of THESE nuts
Heavy is good, heavy is reliable, if does not work , can always hit him with it.
Hey! There’s poop in my butt, and i fart and shit there! shit fucking poop paifery daifery
How are then sausages coming Tommy?
How are you doin vincent?
I’d be doin a lot better if you’d stop using my name!
How silly do I feel? his mum is still smouldering beside us and I’m asking him to fight
I am not in Rome Doug, I am in a rush.
I create the bodies, I dont erase the bodies
I don’t care if he’s mohammed i’m f**king hard bruce lee
I don’t care if he’s Muhammed-Imad-Bruce Lee you cant change fighters.
i dont care if he’s got fuckin’ hazelnuts.
I fucking hate pikeys.
I fucking hate Pikies.
i hate fuckin pikeys
i like rice
I Need To Hav A Shite!
I need to have a shite!
I thought you said he was a getaway driver, what can he get away from?
I thought you said he was a getaway driver. What the fuck can he get away from?
I’ll see you avi
I’m getting heartburn, Tony do something terrible
I’m not looking for Vegas and I’m not looking for legal. I’m looking for Frankie fucking Four-Fingers.
I’m sorry…I couldn’t get the binoculars out in time!
If all bets are off,then there cant be any money can there?
If I throw a dog a bone, I don’t want to know if it tastes good or not. Next time you stop me whilst I’m walking I’ll cut your f***ing jacobs off.
if i was a donkey i’d lay into you with the fist of my c*ck!
In the polite words of the virgin mary, come again?
In the quiet words of the Virgin Mary, come again!
in the silent words of the virgin mary… come again.
in the words of the virgin mary…. come again?
Is that Boris?
It was in a funny angle.
It’s a bit funky in here isn’t it?
It’s a fucking anti-aircraft gun Vincent.
It’s not as though he’s incon-fucking-spicous now is he?
Lincon:Well what happened to ‘im?
Sol: He got shot in da face lincon i thought that’d obvious
Listen to me you fucken fringe.
London?
Yes! London! Ya know fish, chips, cup o tea, bad food, worst weather, Marry fuckin Poppins, London!
London? London. London? yea London. Ya know, fish chips cup o tea, bad food worst weather, Mary fuckin Poppins London.
look in the dog!
Lucky Star.
MAN 1,I’m betting the Hare gets Fucked.
MAN 2, What you mean proper fucked!
Man:Hey fuckface, I don’t think he was talking to you… Vinny: Fuckface…I like that one now, I’ll have to remember that next time I’m climbing off your mum.
Mickey – If I win, I get the caravan and a pair of those shoes. If I lose, Ah fuck’it I’ll do the fight for free!
Mickey:(mumbles incoherently) Have I made myself clear, boys?
Turkish:Do you understand a single word of what he just said?
MICKY:- your not going untill the jobs done you fat lump:
Micky> I’ll make you a deal (dog barks tries to attack him) Fucker!! I’ll bet ya for it. Turkish> you’ll what? Pikeys> he’ll bet ya for it!! Turkish> what like you did with Tommy? Do me a favor Micky. Micky> I will…I’ll harecourse ya for it..I win you buy my Ma the caravan and I also get a pair of them shoes(laughs) you win fuck it i’ll do the fight for free! Turkish (to self) okay I’m bettin the hare gets fucked. Micky> Proper fucked? (laughs alone with tommy and all the Pikeys)
MIKEY:All right! I’ll do it for a caravan!…TURKISH:A what?!?!??!
PIKEYS:A caravan!!!!…TOMMY:It was us that wanted a caravan…Anyway…What’s wrong with this one?..MIKEY:Ah, it’s not for me…(sweetly)it’s for me ma….TOMMY:your what????!??…PIKEYS:His ma!!!!!
MIKEY:Save you breath for coolin’ your porridge….
Mimuthawansacaravan.
Mullet: I heard you weren’t about much these days Tone.
Bullet Tooth Tony: What do you know? Still warm the blood that courses through my
veins. Unlike yours Mullet.
Mullet: what You doing Tony? Tony: driving down the street with your head stuck in me window, what do you think i’m doing you pe-nas?
My name is Turkish. Funny name for an Englishman I know.
My name is Turkish. Funny name for an englishman, I know. My parents happened to be on the same plane when it crashed. Thats how they met. They named me after the name of the plane. Not many people are named after a plane crash.
Need to ‘ave a shite!
NEED TO HAVE A SHITE!
Never under estimate the predictability of stupidity
Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity
Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.
No body brings a fella the size of you unless they trying to say something without talking.
No Tommy it’s tip top, I’m just not sure about the color.
no, all bets at the bookies are off, so no i dont get my fight do i you fucking prat!
nobody brings a fellow the size of you unless they’re tryin to say somethin without talkin, right boss.
not a bad kick for a fat fuck
Now it turns out that this guy is a gypys bare nuckle boxing champion, which makes him harder then a coffin nail.
now we are fucked
Now, we are fucked.
Now… we are fucked.
Oh nothing Tommy. It’s tip-top. I’m just not sure about the color.
Oh you must be the big dick, and the men on either side of you are your balls. Now there are two types of balls: big brave balls and little mincy faggot balls. Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they are not clever. They smell pussy and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two little faggot balls along for a good old time. But you’ve got your parties mangled up. There’s no pussy here, just a dose that’ll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you are having second thoughts. You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with ya.
Perriwinkle Blue boys!
Policeman1:Could you tell me…why you’ve got a dead man with an arm missing in your boot??
Policeman2:hey George…is that a tea cosy on his head?
pull your socks up Avi
put a lead on her turkish before she gets bitin and you dont want to get bite now do ya darlin
Put a leash on her Turkish,before she gets bitten…and you don’t want to get bitten now,do you sweetheart?
Right now tommy, the tit, is praying. And if he isn’t he fuckiong should be.
ROSEBUD:I need a gun.TONY:You don’t,Rosebud,my old son.You need me.
Shut and sit down you big, bald fuck!
Shut up and sit down, you big bald fuck. I don’t like leaving my country, Doug, and I especially don’t like leaving my country for anything more than warm, sunny beaches, and cocktails with little straw hats in them.
–We’ve got beaches here, Avi.
Well who the fuck wants to see them? I hope you can appreciate the concern I have for my friend Franky. We’re gonna find him, Doug, and you’re gonna help me find him – and we’re gonna start at that fight.
Sit down and shut up you big, bald fuck!
Sneaky fucking russian.
So why didn’t you ‘bust a cap in his ass’, Tommy?!
so your obviously the big dick and they and either side of ya are your balls….there are 2 types of balls..big brave balls and mincy little faggit balls your dicks have driven clarity of vision but there not clever they smell pussy and they wanna peice of the action and you thought you’d smelt some good old pussy and have bought your mincy little balls along for a good old time…ut youv’e got your partys muddled up… theres no pussy here just a dose that’ll make ya wish you’d been born a women…….like a prick your having second thoughts your shrinking…and your 2 little balls are shrinking with ya….the fact that youv’e got REPLICA written down the sides of your guns and the fact that iv’e got DESERT EAGLE .50 written down the side of mine shud precipitate your balls into shrinking along with your precense…now ….f*ck off!………….submitted by jamie
So, you’re obviously the big dick, and there on the side of you are your balls. There are 2 types of balls. There are big brave balls and mincy little faggot balls. Now dicks are driven by clarity of vision, but they’re not clever. They smell pussy and want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy. And brought your 2 little mincy balls along for a good old time. But you’ve got your parties mangled up. There ain’t no pussy here. Just a dose that makes you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick you’re having second thoughts. You’re shrinking. And you 2 little balls are shrinking with ya. Now the fact that you’ve got replica written down the side of your gun, and the fact that I have desert eagle .50 written down the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now…. Fuck Off…
So, you’re obviously the big dick, and there on the side of you are your balls. There are 2 types of balls. There are big brave balls and mincy little faggot balls. Now dicks are driven by clarity of vision, but they’re not clever. They smell pussy and want a piece of the action. And you thought you smellt some good old pussy. And you brought your 2 little mincy balls along for a good old time. But you’ve got your parties mangled up. There ain’t no pusy here. Just a Doster that makes you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick you’re having second thoughts. You’re shrinkin. And you 2 litte balls are shrinkin with ya. Now the fact that you’ve got replica written down the side of your gun, and the fact that I have desert eagle written down the side of mine, should percipitate your balls into shrinkin, along with your presence. Now…. Fuck Off…
Sol: He’s a natural, ain’t ya Tyrone? Tyrone: Of course I am. Vinnie: A natural fucking idiot! Tyrone what have you done? Sol: Yea Tyrone, what have you done? Tyrone: You hassle me you see what happens. Vinnie: No don’t move it. Otherwise people’ll see the damage. What’d you do that for? Vinnie: It’s a four-ton truck tyrone. It ain’t as if it’s a pack of fuckin peanuts, now is it? Tyrone: It was at a funny angle! Vinnie: It’s behind you Tyrone. When you reverse, things come from behind you.
Sol: I bought some extra loud blanks just in case. Vinny: What, in case we have to deafen em to death?
SOL: Nope, it’s a moissanite.
Lincoln: A what-anaite ?
SOL: Moissanite is an artificial diamond, Lincoln .. it’s Mickey Mouse man .. spurious [Lincoln still scratching his beard].. NOT genuine, and it’s woth … fuck o.
sol: ooh is that him? Vinnie: i dunno. How many fingers did he have? Sol i’m sorry i couldn’t get the bi-noc-u-lars out in time
sol: ooh is that him? vinnie: i dunno. how many fingers did he have? sol: im sorry i couldn’t get the bi-noc-u-lars out in time
Sol: What is THAT? Vincent: THIS is a shotgun Sol. Sol: It is a fucking anti-aircraft rifle vincent.
SOL:Fill that bag. GIRL:All bets are off. SOL:I am not in here to make a fucking bet. GIRL:Appreciated… but all… bets…are… off.If all bets are off, then there can’t be any money, can there? SOL: I ain’t fucking buying that. GIRL: That’s handy because I ain’t fucking selling it. lt’s a fact!
Solomon: Its a moisonite…gangsta: a whatonite…solomon: moisonite, its fake, not genuine, and its worth….fuckoff.
Solomon:Leave him lone.He’s a natura,ain’t you,Tyrone?
Tyrone:Course I am
Vinny:A natural-fuckin-idiot,Tyrone,what have you done????
Sugar?
No thanks, I’m sweet enough.
Tell the dags to fuck af?
the bit when mickey is talkin and turkish and tommy dont know what the hell hes talking about
the face that you’ve got replica written down the side of your guns, and the fact that i’ve got desert eagle .50 written on the side of mine should precipitate your balls shrinking along with your prescence. Now fuck off.
The fact that you’ve got ‘Replica’ written down the side of your gun. (withdraws his gun) And the fact that I’ve got ‘Desert Eagle point five O’ written on the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence.
Then the big hare gets fucked.
Fucked?Proper fucked.
There are 2 types of balls. There are big,brave balls and there are little,mincey,faggotty balls.
There are two kinds of balls in this world, there are big brave balls, and then there are little mincey faggot balls
They’ll go through bones like butter.
Tommy’s my partner it doesn’t mean we hold hands and take windy walks it just means I keep him out of as much trouble as he gets me into
tommy, the tit, is prayin. and if he isn’t, he fuckin should be.
Tommy, the tit, is praying. And if he isn’t he fucking should be.
Tommy: Who took that jelly out of YOUR doughnut? Turkish: YOU did, Tommy, you took the fucking jelly out of my doughnut. (when Tommy Tells him the Gorgous got knocked out…BTW…Golden Brown BEST SONG.
TOMMY: I was trying to get a good deal. TURKISH: I fail to see the correlation between losing ten grand, hostpitalising Gorgeous, and a good deal!
TOMMY: What happens if the dogs catch the hare? TURKISH: Then the big rabbit gets facked. TOMMY: What? Proper fucked?
Tommy: What if the pikey knocks the other man out before the fourth? Turkish: We get murdered before we leave the building and i would imagine we get fed to the pigs.
TOMMY: Whats up? Dont you think I’ve got the Minerals?
Tommy: You shouldn’t drink that stuff anyways. Turkish: And why not? Tommy: S’not in sync with evolution. Turkish: Oh shut up.
TOMMY:sorry Mickey’s just give us the money back and you can keep the caravan. MICKEY:what the fuck do I want that caravan for it got no fucking wheels.
TOMMY:well what if the other guy knocks the gypsey out. TURKISH:then I imagine we get murdered bfore we leave the building and we get fed to the pigs. TOMMY:I’m glad to see your climbing the walls in anxiety.
TOMMY:well who took the jam out of your donut TURKISH: you you took the jam out of my donut Tommy
Tony: Don’t take the piss Boris!
Tony: So..Your obviously the big dick..and the man on either side of you are your balls. There are two types of balls: There are big, brave balls, and there are little mintzy faggot balls.
Vinny: These are your last words so make them a prayer!
Tony:Your dicks have drive and clarity of vision. They’re not clever.They smell pussy and want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy…and have brought your two little faggot balls along for a good ole time. But got your parties mangled up. There’s no pussy here, just a dose that will make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick…you’re having second thoughts. You’re
shrinking…and your two little balls are shrinkin with ya. The fact that you’ve got replica writtin down the side of your gun…and the fact that i’ve got Desert Eagle .50…writtin down the side of mine..should precipitate your balls into shrinking along with your presence. Now…Fuck off.
Tony: What’s your name? Vinny: Shoot him! (Sol goes to pistolwhip Tony but he catches his arm) Vinny: LET-GO-OF-THE-GUN! Tony: Your obviously the big dick and the man on either side of you are your balls. You know there are two types of balls. Big, brave balls and little minzy faggot balls. Vinny: These are your last words so make them a prayer! Tony: Your shrinking and so are your balls. You lack vision. Dicks aren’t really clever. They smell some pussy and want a piece of the action. You thought you smelled some good old pussy and brought your two little faggot balls along for a good ole time. But your mistaken. There’s no pussy here, just a dose that will make you wish you were born a woman. And the fact that your guns say replica and mine says Desert Eagle .50 should precipitate your balls into shrinking along with your presence. Now FUCK OFF!!
Tony: You mean Boris the Blade, as in Boris the Bulletdodger?
Avi: How come the call him Boris the Bulletdoger? Tony: Because he dodges bullets, Avi!
TONY: Your Having Second Thoughts…Your Shrinking….And Your Two Little Balls Are Shrinking With You
Too tight? You could fit a jumbo fucking jet in that!
turkish,the fights twice the size, i gotta take care of me master, and me ma’ needs a caravan
Turkish– How long on those sausages, Bruce?
Bruce– Five minutes, Turkish.
Turkish– It was two minutes five minutes ago…
Turkish– I want a caravan, and you’re going to buy it for me.
Tommy– What’s wrong with the one we have now?
Turkish– Oh nothing, Tommy, it’s tip top… I’m just not so sure about the color… (as he pulls the door off it’s hinges).
Turkish: Fuck me, hold tight. What’s that?
Tommy: It’s me belt, Turkish.
Turkish: No, Tommy. There’a a gun in your trousers. What’s a gun doing in your trousers?
Tommy: It’s for protection.
Turkish: Protection from what? ‘Zee Germans’?
Turkish: We’ve lost Gorgeous George.
Bricktop: Well, where’d you lose him? He ain’t a set of fucking car keys, is he? And it’s not as if he’s incon-fucking-spicuous, is it?
Turkish: Well do you want to do it?Mickey:That depends.Turkish: On what?Mickey: On you; buyin this caravan. Uh, not the rouge one, but the rose. Turkish: That’s not the same caravan. Mickey: It;’s not the same fight. Turkish: Well it’s the fucking size of the last one.
Mickey: Turkish, the fight’s twice the size, and me mam still needs a caravan. And I like to look after me mam. It’s a fair deal. Take it. Turkish: Mickey, your lucky we’re not worm feed after your last preformance. Buyin’ a tart mobile pallace is a little fucking rich. (Pikey’s give him a menicing look). I wasn’t your mam a tart, I was just sayin’. Mickey: Save your breath for cooling your porridge. Now look…? (Says something in Pikey/ come again?). (Mullet whispers something in his ear). Right. And she’s terribly partial to periwinkle blue, boss.
Turkish: What the fuck!! You put Gorgeous George into a bare knuckle boxing match 2 days before he fights the bomber!
Tommy: He was off his size! Turkish: Tommy you put the man into bare knuckle boxing match what the fuck did you expect? A grease down and a shiatsu?
Tommy: Who put the jam out your donut? Turkish: You did Tommy, you put the fucking jam out my donut!!!
Tommy: Look you said get a good deal. Turkish: A fail to reconigze the correlation in losing ten grand, hospitalising Gorgeous, and a good deal? Now what am i going to tell Bricktop, that his fight aint going to happen?
Tommy: We replace the fighter. Turkish: Oh and hope that he doesn’t notice and who the fuck gonna replace him then?
Tommy: How about John the Gun or Mad Fish Willy. Turkish: Tommy your not exaclty Mr Current affairs are you Tommy? Mad Fish Willy went mad. And the gun shot himself.
Turkish: …Jesus. Tommy: What?! Turkish: Will use the fucking pikey!
TURKISH: Youre not exactly Mr Current affairs are you Tommy? Mad fish Harry…..went mad. And John the gun…. Shot himself.
TURKISH:Boris the blade, or boris the bullet-dodger…Bent as the soviet sickle and hard as the hammer that crosses it…
TURKISH:For every action, there is a reaction; and a pikey reaction is one fucking thing
TURKISH:Now I’m changing fighter….And Bricktop’s gonna exploit the situation…He’s gonna pull my pants down…grease me up….and aim for penetration.
TURKISH:You put the man into a bare-knuckle boxing match…What the fuck did you expect?!?!?!?A grease down and a shiatsu????
Turkish> So will you do it? Micky> that depends. Turkish> on what? Micky> on you buying this caravan. Turkish> It’s not the same caravan! Micky> it’s not the same fight! Turkish> but it’s twice the fucking size of the last one! Micky> Turkish the fight is twice the size and me Ma still needs a caravan. I like to look after me Ma. It’s a fair deal take it. Turkish> Mickey you’re lucky we aren’t wormfood after you last performance and buying a tarts mobile palace is a little fucking rich….I wasn’t calling your mom a tart it just that.. Mickey> ah save you breath for cooling your pourage!!
Turkish> will you do it? Micky> that depends. Turkish> on what? Micky> on you, buying this caravan. Turkish> that’s not the same Caravan!! Micky> it’s not the same fight! and me ma still needs a caravan I like to look after me ma. it’s a fair deal take it!! Turkish> Micky you’re lucky we’re not wormfood after you last performance. and buying a tarts mobile palace is a little fucking rich…I wasn’t calling you mom a tart it’s just that- Mickey> ahh save you breath for cooling your pourage!!
Tyrone, when you go in reverse, things come from behind you!
Tyrone: Don’t worry ’bout me, just worry ’bout that dog dribblin’ on my seats.
Vince: This is a shotgun, Solemon
Sol: No, It’s a fucking anti- aircraft gun Vincent!
Vince:Hey, why are we stopped here? What’s wrong with that space over there? Tyrone:It’s too tight. (all look.) Vince:Too tight? You could land a jumbo-fucking-ject in there! Sol:Leave ‘im alone. He’s a natural, ain’t you Tyrone? Tyrone: Course I am (reverses, smashes into van.) Vince:Natural fucking idiot! Tyrone, what have you done? Sol:Yeah Tyrone, what have you done? Tyrone:Look, you hassle me, you see what happens.
Vincent: Wha’ we stopped here for? what’s wrong with that space over there? Tyrone: It’s too tight Vincent: Too tight? you could land a jumbo fucking jet in there. Sol: Hey, leave him alone. He’s a natural, ain’t ya Tyrone? Tyrone: Course I am.
vincent: Whats wrong with that space over there? Tyrone: It’s too tight. Vincent: You could land a jumbo fucking jet in there!
Vinnie: What’s wrong with that space? Tyrone: ‘s too tight. Vinnie: Too tight?? You could land a Jumbo-Fucking-Jet in there.
Vinny: What’s wrong with the space over there Tyrone?
Tyrone: It’s too tight.
Vinny: Too tight?! You could land a jumbo-fuckin’-jet in there!
Vinny:Why’d we stop here?What’s the matter with that space over there?
Tyrone:It’s to tight.
Vinny:Too tight??You could land a jumbo-fickin-jet in there!!!!!
Viva Las Vegas.
what do i know about diamonds
What do I know about diamonds…? I’m a boxing promoter. I was a happy boxing promoter, until a week ago. Then… what do I know about diamonds? Don’t they come from Antwerp?
What do you mean you lost him? he isnt a set of fucking car keys now is he?
What do you want I should do?
What the fuck do I need a caravan with no wheels for?
What’s tha?
It’s a gun.
That’s not a gun. It’s an anti-fuckin-aircraft weapon!
When a car is racing towards you your life dosen’t flash before you cause your’e too fucking scared. And you do a very stupid thing. You freeze. You freeze and pull a silly face. But the Pikey didn’t. He intended to run the car down. So he reacted. And a pikey reaction is quite a fucking thing.
When you dance with the devil you wait for the song to stop, Know wot i mean
Who is gonna rob 2 black men holding pistols in a car that’s worth less than your shirt?
Bullet Tooth Tony and his friend Desert Eagle .50
Who the fucks talkin’ to you boy
Who the fucks talkin’ to you boy?
Who took the jam out of your donut?
Who’s gonna mug two black fellows holding pistols set in a car thats worth less than your shirt?
Why do I want a caravan with no fuckin’ wheels?
Why do they call him ‘The Bullet Dodger’? Because he dodges fuckin’ bullets!
Why the fuck do I want a caravan that’s got no fucking wheels?
WHy the fuck do I want a caravan that’s got no fucking whells.
Why would I want a caravan if its got no fuckin’ wheels?
Why’d-i-wanna frickin’ caravan fo’? it’s got no fucking wheels!
Ya like dags?
yeah, hes a natural, a natural f*cking idiot
Yeah, London. Fish, chips, cup o tea, bad food, worse weather, Mary Fucking Poppins, London!
Yeah, yeah, but first we get the stone, Rosey, first the stone, and then I’ll get you to a doctor, and not just any doctor, boychick, I’m going to get you to a nice Jewish doctor.
You can call me susan if it makes you happy!
You can call me Susan if it makes you happy.
You can fit a fucking jumbo jet in there!
You can keep that silly fat wanker. The lads can’t lift him.
You can keep the 10 Grand along with the body, but if i see you muthaf*ckas again/…..welll look what happened to him.
You can keep the silly fat wanker, the lads can’t lift em.
You ever cross the road and look the wrong way and presto theres a car nearly on you? So waht do you do? Something very silly. You freeze and your life doesnt flash before you because your too fucking scared to think. You just freeze and pull a stupid face.
You know gyp-os Sol, They’re always throwing dogs in with deals.
You know, London! Fish, chips. Cup o tea. Bad accents. Worse weather. LONDON!
You like dags?
You mean Frankie, I got a fucking problem with gambling Four-Fingers? You know why they call him Frankie Four-Fingers, Doug? ‘Cause he makes stupid bets, and when he doesn’t pay, they give him the chop!
You mean Frankie, I got a fucking problem with gambling fuckin Four-Fingers? You know why they call him Frankie Four-Fingers, Doug? ‘Cause he makes stupid bets with stupid people, and when he doesn’t pay, they give him the chop! and im not talkin about his fuckin foreskin either.
you put the stone in the case? why don’t you chop it off then?
we’re not butchers, Boris
You should never underestimate the predicatbility of stupidity.
you shouldn’t drink that stuff anyway, it’s not in sink with evolution.
You show me how to control a wild fucking gypsy and I’ll show you how to control an unhinged, pig-feeding gangster.
You show me how to control a wild fucking gypsy, and I’ll show you how to control an unhinged, pig-feeding gangster!
you’re a sensitive boy, ain’t ya, tommy
You’re always goin to have problems lifting a body in 1 piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up the corpse into 6 pieces and pile it all togetha. And when you got your 6 pieces you gotta get rid of’em ’cause it’s no good leavin’ it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs, you gotta starve the pigs for a few days then the sight of a chopped up body will look like curry to a piss head. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggie’s digestion. You could do this afterwards o’course but you don’t wanna go siftin’ thru pig shit now do ya. They will go thru bone like butta. You need at least 16 pigs to finish the job in one sitting so be wary of any man who owns a pig farm. They will go thru a body that weighs 200 pounds in about 8 minutes. That means that a single pig can consume 2 pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression ‘as greedy as a pig’.
you’re always going to have trouble carrying a body in one piece. it seems the best thing to do is cut it into 6 pieces and pile ‘m all together.
You’re not a dog are you Gary?
Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Snatch’: Quotes from the movie ‘Snatch’