Innocent English

–If I spill, my life ain’t worth a nickel. –And how much is your soul worth if you don’t? –Which side are you with? –Me? I’m with me, Terry. Friendly: Theyre dusting off the hot seat for me!!!!! Hey, you wanna hear my philosophy of life? Do it to him before he does it to you. I could have been a...

*singing* As the adding machine once said…you can’t count on me. –Did you see ‘The Lost Weekend’? –Yes, I think I’m living through it. –Hilde, do you know where we can hide? –Sure, I know a place right across the Brooklyn bridge where they’ll never find us. –Where is it? –Brooklyn! As the adding...

(1)Two questions. What is your name? And can I please have your phone number? (2)Abby, and I thought you’d never ask. 1) I’ve loved you since we first met on the L 2) That was very convincing! 1) I’ve loved you since we first met on the L?! Who wrote this?! E to the R to the I to the C, in the...

–It’s all over now, isn’t it? –Yes, it’s all over. human beings would be stupid enough to blow themselves off the face of the earth I love Americans. They’re so naive. Is your invitation to spread a little fertilizer still open? Prepare to surface! The war started when people accepted the idiotic...

#1. What should I call your wife? #2. How about her name? Ethel. Ethel Thayer. Thounds like I’m lithping. (boy) So, I hear you turned 80 today! (man) Is that what you heard? (boy)Yeah, Man thats really old. (man) You should meet my father. (boy) Your father’s still alive? (man) Naaah, but you...

When this all started, I told you that we’d find the son of a bitch sir, I never expected that the son of a bitch would be you. Can you tell me what is the essence of man? He’d need a miracle to stop us now! I guess it doesn’t really matter since I kind of blew up all the evidence. I wouldn’t dirty...

1) Have you ever been to England, Miss Gamble? 2) No, I’m afraid of flying. Well, not so much of flying, more so of the ‘no smoking’ sign. 1. What are you going to do about Warren? 2. Warren doesn’t care. 1. Warren cares. 2. Warren cares. But I don’t care! 1. You gotta care, because if you don’t...

1) he wants me to stab him..to kill him!!!..but he’s just a child, he’s not responsible…..I won’t do it !!! 2) Then I’ll do it !!! 1)I never want to see or hear from you again. 2) You’ll see me in hell Mr. Thorn. We’ll spend eternity together. 1)What’s the matter, those other kids didn’t want to...

#1: Definition of a scientist — A man who understands nothing until there was nothing left to understand. #2: So, there is a little light in the forest afterall. –You could save the world. –Screw the world. Another day, another dollar. Are you God? Is there anything you can do, DOCTOR, I mean,...

(1)-These sausages are mouldy (2)-SHut up and drink ya Gin (Dodger)-Fagin what should i do? (Fagin)-Live up to you name Dodger, Dodge about 1)Would you climb a hill? 2)Anything. 1)Wear a daffodil? 2)Anything. 1)Leave me all your will? 2)Anything. 1)Even fight my Bill? 2)Wot fisticuffs? 1)Ya do love...

1. You’re not being fair! 2. Fairs are for tourists kid. Consider it a free lesson in street savior faire from New’s York’s coolest quadrapede. Check ya later! Absitivly Posolutly. Aieee! It´s an alien! He’s a spy, man! Come on, let’s eat him! You’re dead meat, kitty! I don’t eat cats, too much...

(Ol’ Yeller’s gone rabid and Mama’s holding a shotgun)Travis: No mama! Mama: There’s no hope for him now. He’s sufferin’. You know we gotta do it. Travis: I know Mama… But he was my dog… I’ll do it. Don’t you ever run out of questions? He’s a heap more dog than I ever had him figured for. If that...

Ok, now go get me a fresh beer. Are you for real?! Now you son of a bitch now!!! Hey, remember rodney’s kid brother, cheese? Actually, My name isn’t, cheese, anymore. O ya. Cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese. Didn’t we lock you in a dumpster? (1.)Why you gotta do it around the kid? With the F’in? All you gotta...

1 I’m going to stop Ado Annie from killin yer wife! 2 Wait! Mind your own business! 1) And what do they wear to bathe socially in Persia? 2) Nothing! 1) Nothing!!! OOOOH!!! 1) He called me his persian kitten 2) What did you call her that fer? 3) I don’t remember- 1) I do. He said that I was his...

–Sometimes, now and then, couldn’t we just talk? –I tell you what. You talk. I’ll listen. 1) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? 2) So help me Me. 3) So help you you? Court Reporter: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?...

1- Got an injury there, boy? 2- Not exactly, Sir. 1- I’ve changed, Sir, I’ve changed since I’ve gotten here. 2- No, you’ve just cleaned up your act a bit. Be proud of them wings, boy, they’re the only ones you’re gonna leave here wit. Before you get to sell what we teach you here over at United...

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Good Intelligence quotes: Best famous quotes about Intelligence The invention of IQ does a great disservice to creativity in education. – Joel Hildebrand The course of every intellectual, if he pursues his journey long and unflinchingly enough, ends in the obvious, from which the non-intellectuals...

Good quotes about Intelligence: Some of the best great quotes about Intelligence Man becomes man only by his intelligence, but he is man only by his heart. – Henri Frederic Amiel Wit is educated insolence. – Aristotle Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. – Ambrose...

motivation speech #1 But they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much. And I kept my staples for the Swingline stapler. #2 Ok Melvin. #1 No, it’s not ok because if they make me…if they take my stapler…I’ll have to set the...