Innocent English

1 – My parents say my future is right on the horizon. 2 – Tell them the horizon is an imaginary line that recedes as you approach it. 1) What does she expect from us 2) Attendance A girdle to set you free! BETTY: Does he pay you for sex, i mean at the rate your going, you could make a fortune....

(Mommie) Clean up this messsss! (Tina) But how? (mommie) You figure it out!…….(Tina) Jesus Christ…. 1) CLEAN UP THIS MESS! 2) How? 1) YOU figure it out! 1. Christina, you havent hardly touched your lunch. 2. But its raw.. its got all these red juices that come out when i press on it. 3. its not...

Here’s another good inspirational story: An Angel An Angel wrote: Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart. To handle yourself, use your head; To handle others, use your heart. Anger is only one letter short of danger. If someone...

Here’s another good inspirational story: All the Time in the World . . . While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground. “That’s my son over there,” she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide. “He’s a fine looking boy,”...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Alabaster Boxes Do not keep the alabaster boxes of your love and tenderness sealed up, until your friends are dead. Fill their lives with sweetness. Speak approving, cheering words while their ears can hear them and while their hearts can be thrilled and...

Everybody needs love. For you and I. I’ve had it with cheap sex. It leaves me feeling cheap. Moment by moment. Sometimes when we touch. Trish, we’ve got to talk…What about the pool filter? You know I love you. Your heart never lies. Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Moment by Moment’: Quotes from the...

Circumstances have taught me that a man’s ethics are the only possessions he will take beyond the grave. Great money does not a great human make. I’m not going to fear any man of flesh and blood, no matter what costume he wears. Moll’s got the pox! Moll’s got the pox!...

–Doesn’t a woman’s reputation mean anything to you? –Not unless I’m personally involved. Comin’ through the rye. Everything snarls around this joint! I made my contribution to this mixed-up community they call the world. Let me jump to my own conclusions. Out here we have three cures for...

Alone’s kind of a nice place to be. C’mon, please, we’re men. Can we have a bond? God, I have so many great albums. I love ’em. I love ’em. I haven’t been feeling good lately. I think it’s probably us…This is more serious than you think…I think it’s over. It’s going to be perfect. I promise. Oh,...

Fact 1. There is a Hamburger hall of fame in Seymour, Wisconsin. Fact 2. There is a Harley-Davidson that was designed as an exact replica of a hamburger. Fact 3. There is a large brass statue of Winnie-the-Pooh in Lima, Peru. Fact 4. There is a law in the state of Idaho that does not permit one...

Fact 1. The worlds tallest free fall rollercoaster is The Giant Drop located in Australia. The drops is 120 meters which is equivalent to a 39 storey building. Fact 2. The Xerox company was initially called the Haloid Company. Fact 3. The YKK on the zipper of your Levis stands for Yoshida Kogyo...

Fact 1. The theme song of the Harlem Globetrotters is “Sweet Georgia Brown.” Fact 2. The thickness of the Arctic ice sheet is on average 10 feet. There are some areas that are thick as 65 feet. Fact 3. The thing that hangs from the top of the beak of a turkey is called the snood. Fact 4. The three...

1: Oh my gosh, you’re like JANINE ADAMS! 2: And you’re like… REALLY familiar-looking. 1: There’s someone here to see you. He says his name is Josh the Informant. Alex-I wonder…are meteors like shooting stars..can you make a wish on them. Jason- sure…try (alex closes her eyes)You know..You...

1# you know, i think everythings gonna be ok 2# really? 1# i dont know it just feels really good to say that. 1/Don’t be stupid 2/You call me stupid??!! I got a fucked-up ankle.. I got brain and blood all over my body and you callin’ me stupid??!! Well, you know what??!! FUCK YOU!! 1/_Man, this job...

(Alfred E. Neman, Mad Magazine, 1956) They call me fish meal. (Famous first line.) They call me Ishmael. (President Clinton reading famous American Classic in ovel office)Thar she blows. 1.Who is that man? 2.A new crewman, a rookie. 1.How do you know he’s a rookie? 2.He brought along 20 pound test...

(singing) I like eating cheese, it taste very nice. Everyone likes cheese, especially white mice. 1) Just click it! Just click it! Go ahead, click it! Click–*BANG* 2)We got disconnected. 1)If they’re desperate, they’ll call back. (they wait a while) (2 picks up the phone) 2)It’s working. (sit there...

Captain, it is I, Ensign Pulver and I just threw your rotten stinking palm tree over the side. Now what’s this about no movie tonight? Captain, it is I, Ensign Pulver, and I want you to know that I just threw your stinkin’ palm tree overboard. Now what’s all this crud about no movie tonight?...

The closer you get towards Canada, the more things eat your horses. I’d like almost anything better ‘n’ bein’ burnt up. Nicholson character: I don’t steal horses. Brando character: Somebody does. The only things not on my diet would be the green top of the beet and okra. The way you can tell you’re...

–Anil, you have become American. –So what? I’m living in America! You don’t like it? Then go back to India! Home is where the heart is, and my heart is with you. I am a black man born and raised in Mississippi. Ain’t nothing you can tell me about struggle. Just one of tham thangs. Ton of joy. Up...

–This is a political meeting. –Looks like Klan talk to me. With or without the Halloween costumes. –You have to be a member to drink here. –Member of what? –Social club. –You know, if I were a Negro, I’d probably think the same way they do. –If you were a Negro, nobody would give a damn what you...