Innocent English

#1 Oops #2 What do you mean oops? #1 I got it the guy has the thing wrong. Why don’t you say we try that one again. #2 Yes yes without the oos yes that way. ‘I picked a hell of a day to quit drinking.’ ‘You really think you can fly that thing?’ (1) Left, left, tunnel, tunnel, exit, exit, left. (2)...

Diana: If you ever want something badly, let it go. If it comes back to you, then it’s yours forever. If it doesn’t, then it was never your’s to begin with. John: What would you say if I offered you one million dollars… for one night with your wife? Diana: He’d tell you to go to hell. Ahhh, To hell...

1) Hey, ICE of you to drop by. 2) Ha ha, haven’t heard that one before 1) Honey? 2) What? 1) Where is my supersuit? 1) How ya doin’, honey? 2) Do I HAVE to answer? 1) Jack Jack doesn’t have any powers 2) Oh, well he’ll look fabulous anyway 1) So now I’m in deep trouble. I mean, one more jolt of...

#1- I can’t take it anymore. The idea of you out there dead and me all alone back here with the smoke and the bullets. I can’t take it. #2- Are you serious? #1- I can’t stay here. #2- Okay, But remember serpentine! #1- It’s Germany before Hitler you can see that! I don’t know what people are...

ROAR ROAR ROAR Are you alriht Da?!…. Wake up!! – Gerry Don’t give me norther Ireland…I don’t want a bad trip! He [Guiseppe Conlon] had a cliche for every occasion -Gerry Conlon I can make him confess – Dixon I don’t make threats, I just carry out orders – McAndrews I fuckin’ pissed on it! I pissed...

Ah, reality is just what we tell each other it is. Do you read Sutter Kane? Every species can smell its own extinction. The last ones left won’t have a pretty time with it. In ten years, maybe less, the human race will just be a bedtime story for their children. A myth, nothing more. God’s not...

#1 Am I being paranoid or is he busting my balls? #2 Probably a little of both #1 Fate has brought us together Frank. I just can’t get over the irony. #2 What irony? #1 You being intimately involved with the assassination of two Presidents. #1 Frank, you know Matt Wilder? #2 Yeah. Matt. #3 Frank...

$169.39 a week. –Where you keeping the pie tonight? –I ate the last piece just before you came in. –You take care, y’hear? –Yeah. 1) Whatcha hit him with? 2) Hit whom? 3) WHOM? Are you a northern boy? What’s a northern boy doing down here? Boy, it would give me a whirl of satisfaction to horse whip...

……..im trying to burry my beak …I’d better call 976, find a doctor and tag an ambulance cause your gonna tear off my toe and spit down my head, right? 1)JAck? 2)yeah 1)were’d the sun go? 2)there is no sun anymore Bones…we’ve died and this is hell 1)Jack?? 2)yeah? 1)Were’d the sun go? 2)There is no...

Ernie: Am I going to lose my leg? Aggie: I will have you up and dancing in no time. Ernie: I’m not a very good dancer. Aggie: I am, I will teach you. Ernie: Do you love me? Ernie: I need to hear you say it. Say it! Aggie: I LOVE YOU. he hasn’t even been with a woman yet I came to tell you, I love...

“PFG Carter, PFG.” “What’s PFG?” “Pretty fricken good!” “You just pick the right one to be in the foxhole with, and when you’re out of the foxhole, you keep your dick in your pants.” “You pussies ready to get schooled?” I just want you to know I enjoyed talking to you more than maybe anyone in my...

–This has been the best Thanksgiving ever. –I do good holidays…You just wait til Christmas. –What did the medic think it was? –Meningitis. A promise is a promise. Between all of us, we have just enough hands to make this boat operational. With your men join my men, we might have a chance. The...

Â

…I can live with this too. 1. I thought I was supposed to die in the lake! 2. Maybe you should develop a limp! 1.if you could have one wish daddy, what would it be?2.that i didn’t need one. But i really went out of my way to bring you here! I’m so sorry sorry sorry. It had been a long day and...

And if the silver dollar pancakes aren’t this size, I’m sending them back. Brittany Foster: Listen, don’t think that you can just walk in and interfere with one’s life. Don’t fuck with me cause I can make you pay dearly. I brought you in, Adrien, I can just a easily throw you out. Adrien Williams:...

–Did you ever hang any paper? –I couldn’t cash a check, even if it was good. –It’s nice the way you think about your folks. –Yeah, I’m a real thoughtful bastard. I ate em I got you figured for a natural born killer. I though Mr. Clutter was a very nice man. He was a real gentleman. I thought so...

(1) All the nominees are artists. We shouldn’t be forced to compete with each other, like dogs. (2) Well, I hear ya. Good point. So, then why are ya here? (1) In case I win. (1) I’ve gotten some calls from parents wondering if, in fact, you were a ho-ho-ho-ho . . . (2) Homeroom teacher? (1)Do I...

–And what do you call an epic? –You know, a picture that’s real long and has lots of things going on. –How can anyone like a face like this? –I said I liked it. I didn’t say I wanted to kiss it. Do you look down on all women? Or just the ones you know? I admit the jokes could be better, but I don’t...

(man to his woman): you have offended my honor, now all i have left is a show of strength, besides, women like that sort of thing. (woman): are you insane? A woman will always bend toward a strong man….just as the vine bends toward the wall. A woman is always at the point of abandoning herself...

(1)Good afternoon, dear *****, I hope you are behaving very well. (2) Well, I am feeling very well, Aunt *******. (1) That’s not quite the same thing. In fact, the two things rarely go together. –Do you smoke? –Well, yes, I must admit I smoke. –I’m glad to hear it. A man should have an occupation...