Innocent English

Good quotes about Art: Some of the best great quotes about Art You don’t take a photograph, you make it. – Ansel Adams Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep. – Scott Adams There is nothing worse than a sharp image of a fuzzy concept. – Ansel Adams There...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Acorns and Pumpkins An old poem describes a woman walking through a meadow, meditating on nature. While strolling about, she came upon a field of golden pumpkins. In the corner of the field stood a majestic, huge oak tree. She sat under the oak tree musing...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Cheering Me On I close my eyes as tight as they can go. The lights go off, and my imagination switches on. Pictures flash through my mind like an old film from the fifties. I remember driving home by myself for the first time. Now, I look into the future and...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Small Victories Standing in the noisy cafeteria of the old school, I was watching the students line up for lunch. Having wearied of trying to “cut” in line on each other, they were intently moving toward the food. As I continued to watch their progress, I...

1.) Hey, you know what I think? 2.) No, what do you think? 1.) Were gonna be staarss. Corky: I tried, you saw! Fats: TRIED! YOU TRIIED! but you faailed! Fats: How was the orgy? Did you score? Corky: The high point of the evening was when I reduced her to tears. Fats: When we leaving? Corky:...

1)Let me ask you a question. Train A leaves Los Angelos at 3:00 at 80 miles per hour, and train B leaves San Fransisco at 4:00 at 60 miles per hour. Which train reaches Sea World first? 2)Dad, this is 1933. Sea World wasn’t even built yet. 3)You tried to trick me! 1)What happened to me? 2)You lost...

Fact 1. Finland is also known as “the land of of the thousand lakes,” because of the over 188,000 lakes found in this country. Fact 2. Finnish folklore states that when Santa comes to Finland to deliver gifts, he leaves his sleigh behind and rides on a goat named Ukko instead. Fact 3. Fires onland...

Fact 1. Each year, Americans throw away 25 trillion Styrofoam cups. Fact 2. Earl Dean developed the bottle design for Coca-Cola. Fact 3. Early hockey games allowed as many as 30 players a side on the ice. Fact 4. Early Romans used to use porcupine quills as toothpicks. Fact 5. Early sewing machines...

Fact 1. Columbia University is the second largest landowner in New York City, after the Catholic Church. Fact 2. Common pesticides such as roach, termite and flea insecticide can be found in the bodies of majority of Americans. Fact 3. Constipation is caused when too much water is absorbed in the...

–A gun under every tuxedo. –That’s right. –I came here for justice. I’m going to get it. I don’t want a policeman’s idea of justice. I want a victim’s idea of justice, from the bottom looking up, not from the top looking down. –I think you’re talking about revenge, not justice. –If I asked for a...

1. Your giving me gray hair. 2. Can I see? 1. No. 1.The cut a three inch hole in me, then they pulled out my guts. Alright I was asleep. 2. So basically you took a long nap. 1. But wait, I have not showed you the best part yet. Come over here, come over. Look at what they gave me in exchange for my...

(one person)Hey you wanna go out sometime? No. I was just asking if you wanted to see a movie or something. I said no. Bitch. Yo mama. 1. I don’t mean to be crass, but my sperm has been in your body. 2. And you figure you should just follow? 2.Well, I generally like to be first. Are you giving me...

(Panda)Go ahead, call me names. (Gig)You moron! dont let the seeds spoil your watermelon Happy bridegroom – hoo hoo! Happy bridegroom – yoo hoo! Happy bridegroom, happy bridegroom, happy bridegroom – yoo hoo! I can’t describe her. Nobody can. I wasn’t always a bitter old woman. I wasn’t always a...

"Excuse me, wh- you don’t have to hit me … excuse me." "Excuse me?" "I’m sweeping, you don’t have to hit me with a whip. Wh’you got a horse outside? Don’t hit me with the whip, please." "What’s your name?" "My name’s not important, I’m trying to do a jo-" "What’s your name?" "My name’s not...

-a bull’s eye, nice shot morris -thank you -Where are all the humans? -WE killed them and ate their livers…. -….. -Got ya! Africa…that’s not gonna fly. Rico! Alex the Lion: Surprise! Marty the Zebra: Alex. do not interrupt me when i’m daydreaming when the Zebra’s in the zone just leave em alone....

(1) How good is he? (2) He can beat most men with his breath. (After man got hit with arrow throw door) Max: I’ll open the door on the count of three. Man:OK In unison: 1… (Door rips open) Man: (In agony) What happened to 2? aint we a pair, raggedy man??!! one day cock-of-the-walk…. next day a...

A fella, a quick fella, might keep a weapon under there. I’d have to pin his head to the bumper. Fear is our ally. If it’s all the same to you, I’ll drive that tanker. Looks like I got me some gasoline, ‘eh? The last of the V8 Interceptors. Two days ago I saw a vehicle that could haul that tanker....

*TAGLINE* When the gangs take over the highway…. Remember, he’s on YOUR side! – That must be your friend over there. They didn’t leave much of him. – Must’ve cut his heart out, eh? – Yes. That’s what I meant. Poor bastard! – The Nightrider!!! That is his name… say it……the Nightrider!!! – The...

–How much am I going for? –About 40 dollars. –Is that all? –Knocked down from 75. –I must be out of season. 1) What, you got laid last night? 2): I don’t get laid, I make love. 1- I should do some sit ups or something. 2) Now?! 1) No not now… I heard two Buddy Hackett jokes, a Pat Cooper, and half...

(1)I’m who Americans trust for their news. (2)You really shouldn’t let a marketing slogan go your head. A man has been shot; a line has been crossed. Don’t negotiate my emotions. I don’t want to cross the line lou, I just wanna move it a little. Jeez, I sent you to cover a piece of fluff, and you...