Innocent English

I wouldn’t have missed it for the world Bobby! if they were the library police i would be one of their ten most wanted. It will be the kiss by which all others in your life will be judged. It’s funny how when you’re a kid, a day can last forever. Now, all these years seem just like a blink… -Bunni....

‘If you don’t leave me alone, I’m gonna jam this shoe up your ass.’ ‘Who told you I’m into that?’ -So, why are you following me? -I’m not following you! -Then what are you doing here? -Come on, I’ll show you. -You’re not out here burying highschool kids, are you? -Well they egged my car. 1)(In...

I am the ayatollah of rock and rolla. (Highway) Strip off those T-shirts. (Marine) But Gunny we’re all the same. (Highway) The same as me? (What are you planning on doing Sergeant Gunny?) I plan on making them lifetakers and heartbreakers sir. 1) If you want to pop that puppys can, you dont have to...

harrison, you died a faliure because you never tried Harrison: Maybe I’ll take your car for a spin. Julia: I didn’t know you knew how to drive. Harrison:(shrugs) I’ll take a shot at it. Honey! It’s the stamps! Hope you meet a good-lookin’ angel up there. I buy him all these toys, he laughs at the...

–What’ve you got? –I haven’t got Laura. -he’s a horny bastard isn’t he -i wouldn’t know i just met him -not him, the dog -I feel like I know him intimently. -Darling. You left the blinds open. We all know him intimently. -Hey Mandi, How do you do that thing with your back? -I got the runs…I mean I...

–Are you executive material? –Do you mean can I play hardball? –No, I mean can you kiss ass? For money and power, Jack. It’s the American way. In the old days, I’d have had that son-of-a-bitch in cement and in the river faster than you could say Henry Ford! Lesson number 1: beware of the furniture...

1)um ii dont think your allowed to say that on national t.v. 2)your telling me a grown man has never said the word shit before in his life, and i’ll tell you hes full of shit! America is the most powerful nation on earth! If America was a woman, America would be a big titty woman! And everyone...

(women to mickey) Now suck the poisen out of my finger before it reaches my heart (mickey starts talking ot mike…..girl faints)(mike to mickey) Whats wrong with her (mickey walks over to girl and starts kicking her) Come on now…..your not dead stop faking (girl) Stop kicking me. 1) I keep telling...

the best fucking ball player around #1: What kind of name is Jesus anyway? #2: It’s biblical… #1:No shit. 1. What kind of name is Jesus. 2. It’s a biblical name. 3. No shit! Do you know how to spell pussy? I can spell pussy, P-U-S… H-I-V! Hello again everyone, I’m Robin Roberts, welcome to...

Justin: I didn’t mind the occasional case of brandy. Everyone does that. Lady Vulcan: It was only occasional, I swear. Justin: Stop lying to me. I know everything. You’re now running a huge criminal conspiracy– Lady Vulcan: Oh, what an exaggeration. Justin: I’ve let you use me. I’ve always detested...

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‘It was freaky. Kinda like the Teletubbies. Except they sing, which is scarier.’ ‘WELCOME HOME, ELEANOR’ (calling up the chimney) Helloooo, Santa! (correction of quote) Theo to Nell: Don’t you love it here? (Theo to Nell) You love it here? 1) (bumping into 2) I’m sorry! 2) That’s all right. I...

Find the black crypt with no name or soon your fate will be the same. Jim : Hey honey, you know they have dead people in the backyard. Jim : Hold on! Madame Leota : With what? Leota : Find the thing that must be read, lest your heart be filled with dread… Madame Leota : Dark spirits from the grave...

… but now that dark cloud has pissed …. PASSED! A loon for a husband, and Peter Pan as his wife! F: My son does this wonderful impression of Aunt Kate. He’s got her voice down to a T. And, well, sometimes he likes to put on one of Aunt Kate’s dresses to entertain at family gatherings. V: I see. F:...

–Don’t you shoot him or you’ll have to shoot me too. –Don’t tempt me. –Pockets, what are you doing? –I’m trying to milk the goat. –Well, that’s the wrong kind of goat. That’s a ram! 1/ I had a bull chase me once… 2/ Really? 1/ Yep 2/ Sure it wasn’t the other way round? 1/ Some day, Pockets, some...

1.Does Elwood see anybody these days? 2.Oh, yes, Aunt Ethel, Elwood sees *somebody*. 1.What can I do for you, Mr. Dowd? 2.What did you have in mind? As I was going down to the taxi cab to get Elwood’s things, this awful man stepped out. He was a white slaver, I know he was. He was wearing one of...

double, double, toil and trouble, fire burn, and couldran bubble (1) You can know where everyone is… (2) anytime (1) anywhere (2) every minute (1) of every day (2) And when you’re done, just say… (1,2) Mischief managed! Otherwise anyone can read it! (1)Ancient Egyptians used to worship cats, you...

1)I really do hate the children. 1)[during an inspection] You applied first for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post, is that correct? 2) Yes. 1)But you were unsuccessful? 2)Obviously. Cho: Mistletoe.Harry: Probably full of nargles.Cho: What are nargles?Harry: No idea.[they kiss] Dudley:...

-remember I told Hermione to tell you, that Seamus told me that Dean was told by Parvaty, that Hagrid was looking for you… I thought that you would figure that out… -how can anyone fugure that out… ITS COMPLETELY MENTAL! by: KaReN 1) ‘An hour long you have to look.’ Again, obvious, all though...

(Harry, ROn and Hermione walking up the stairs)Hermione: Hearing voices isn’t good, even in the wizarding world. And walks away. Photo of a man talks to Harry and Ron: She’s right you know. (in a very high voice) Can we start to panic now? (Neville faints) Prof. Sprout-ah, Longbottoms got the...