Innocent English

But first, a couple of funny signs Every day Innocentenglish.com posts 2 new funny signs and a funny quick break post. This Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones, so you can browse thru any you missed. Â Â From the cover of a notebook used by one of my Korean students: My...

But first, a couple of funny signs Every day Innocentenglish.com posts 2 new funny signs and a funny quick break post. This Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones, so you can browse thru any you missed. Â Â “The Swiss have an interesting army. Five hundred years without a...

…the merciful gods lefta shovelful of sand…. Thomsen (drunk): I’ll take a piss then leave then. I have other plans! A simple song won’t make you the King of England, Number One! A toast to our wonderful…abstaining…womanless…Fuhrer, who rose gloriously from apprentice painter to become the world’s...

1) Don’t be an ass 2) That’s the second time you’ve told me that Inspirational! Purely Inspirational! It’s a long, long was to tipperary. Keep the home fires burning. Pack up your troubles in your old kit bag and smile, smile, smile. Whistling Away The Dark. with rings on her fingers and bells on...

(1)Are we all gonna’ die? (2)Yeah, probably. (1)All this over a fuckin’ tooth. 1) She won’t come in the light. 2) Who? 1) You know who. 1) We have to jump. 2) No! Are you crazy? 1) Yeah, little bit. All this for a fuckin tooth? Guard:Whee…is she gonna get me? Kyle:…Yes. Police Officer:Let’s see...

–Oh, God! Don’t! I told you everything. –I know, Rick. I know you did….But let’s pretend you didn’t! Call me Darkman. DARKMAN: KISS YOUR ASS GOODBYE, DURANT! I am everyone… and no one. Everywhere. Nowhere. I’m everyone… and no one. Everywhere. Nowhere. I’m learing to live with a lot of things. If...

I haven’t any time for doctors. I must go in now. No one must be here…Ann, be my best friend. Go now, please. I think I’ll have a large order of prognosis negative! I’m well and strong and nothing can touch me. It’s getting darker by the minute. Funny, I can still feel the sun on my hands. Nothing...

–Don’t you gent lonely up here all by yourself? –I was born lonely, I guess. –I’ll make you look as if you’ve lived. –I have, Doc. Hard a hard night, Bud?! I perfected my own special technique 12 years ago before I was kicked out of the medical association. I see you like swing music. I sure look...

–Bubba’s dead. –I know. Bubba didn’t do it Bubba didn’t do it. don’t you know what he’s doing…he’s playing the hiding game. Red and yellow blue and green, are the flowers that i see, growing in the fields of me, to brighten up our way ay ay, to brighten up our way…. Red and yellow green and blue,...

(1)Are you a Gelfling? (2)Yes, my name is Jen. (1) But Gelfling all dead, Garthem kill them all, you CAN’T be Gelfling. You look like a Gelfling, smell like a Gelfling; Maybe you ARE a Gelfling. (1)mmmm(2)I hate your whimper (1)hmmmm(2)QUIET!(1)mmmmmm (1)Who sent ya? (2)My master, wisest of the...

–Mr. Galt, I think someone’s following us. –Yes, I know. –Quite a turnout, Hardy. Everybody’s here. –Yes. Nauseating mixture of Park Avenue and Broadway. Proves I’m a liberal. How I detest the dawn! The grass always look like it’s been left out all night. How I detest the dawn. THe grass always...

I have become the monster you were intended to be. (1)You left your wallet here, buddy. (2)When did I do that? (1)When you was last here. (2)When was that? (1)When you left your wallet. (speaking to himself) Good evening, Mr. Murdoch. It is Mr. Murdoch, isn’t it? Mr. J ‘something’ Murdoch? J....

–How ugly do you think it’ll get for me? –Ugly. And I say try, because I have no idea what a healthy relationship looks like. And you wonder why I drink. At the end of the day, the bullets were in the bad guys. Not us. Be a team player. I have a hard time keeping track of all your shootings and...

1) It’s a new world, and we don’t belong in it. 2) Any world I’m in, I belong in. 1) Oh, you always got an excuse. But the plain fact is, a lot of time goes by without our making love. Cora, this is a marriage! 2) There are other things in marriage. 1) Yeah, but the part I’m talking about is...

anything else? yeah..i want a bloddy costume (1)Excuse me, could you tell me where I could find some honey? (2)[Not looking up] It’s right in front of you. (1)You’re going to need to be a little more specific. (2)What are you- (1)Blind? (1)Nice to meet you, Matt Murdoch. (2)Nice to meet you, uhh, I...

1) You, what’s your name? 2) Darrell…yeah, I know some motherfucking karate! 1) Can you Must something? 2) Yeah, I must be taking a piss. 1) I want the chicken…a whole one. 2) Make that two. 3) Two…whole chickens. 2) And one to go. 1) Why do you care? You’re just here for the money. 2) I’m here...

All of that kissing must have made your cheeks stronger But make no mistake, the culprits will be fingered. I will finger the culprits. ding fucking dung the bitch is dead Forgive me, Father, for I am 14. Francis: Not everyone has to make up trouble for themselves, just so they’re not bored! Tim:...

1) I often wonder how it is you came to invent yourself. 2) (shrugs) I had no choice, did I? I’m a woman. You can destroy our lives with a few carefully-chosen words… 1) The contessa has offered me extensive use of her gardens. It seems her husbands fingers are not as green as they once were. 2) Ah...

A peacock does not an inheritance make. I confess, I fuck devinely…those who richly wine and dine me! I’m all booked up. M: There’s not a woman in Venice that I can’t have. V: And there’s not a man in Venice I can’t have Marco: You know we can’t marry. Veronica: I know only what you tell me. Marco:...

Suck my bALLS (PRETTY PLEASE) im Hakerin 4 a spankeri #1 Grass grows on the prairie. #2 Grass grows on the prairie…uh…..*attempts it in foreign language* #1 (laughs) No, you said ‘Fire lives on the prairie’. (Dunbar) No, I can’t eat another bit. I am full. Yes, it was very good even spiral cut. (In...