Innocent English

#1. Do you have anymore of those bean thingies please? #2. How many do you want? #3. How many have you got!?! 1) We’re still married, in the eyes of God. 2) Then he must be blind. 1)My dad says she’s an athiest. 2)What’s that? 1)I don’t know. 1. Your cinnamon looks rancid. 2. Oh well, it’s not...

*Singing*- And our pretty Chitty Bang Bang, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang we love you….. …And the big, brown bear came lollopin’ through the forrest. 1. He’s awful! 2. He’s terrible! 3. Not only that, he’s not even nice! From the ashes of disaster grow the roses of success And the big brown bear, came...

A bourbon man – on the inside. Billy wants revenge. Mr. Chisum wants justice. Billy wants revenge. Mr. Chisum wants justice. There’s a big difference. Do that mean what I think it means? –It do. I prefer storekeepers. I’m going to bring Billy the Kid in dead or alive. I’m going to write President...

-Were the hottest act in rock and roll. But you don’t have that problem do you? -Sure we do! -Ah-ha-ha-ha, no you don’t. -All right Mr. Popularity! How much you wanna bet we can out rock and roll you?!...

Alright then …… let’s beat’em up. I’ve made plans. So why did you kill my teacher then? Why did you kill my teacher:? Why-why-why-why-why-why-why-why-why? Why did you kill my teacher?!?! So, you’re Japanese. Well, what about it? That’s right, we killed your teacher. Hey, what are you trying to do?...

‘Course I’m respectable. I’m old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough. –Are you alone? –Aren’t we all? –He lives at 1712 Alameda. Do you know where that is? –Sure. It’s in Chinatown. –Say hello to Mr. Gittes, sweetheart. –Hello. –There’s something...

(answering machine) Yeah, this is Richard, you know, you’re a real asshole, Kimberley!!! –What makes you think they’re looking for a scapegoat? –Tradition. 1/ Richard, I want that goddamn film! 2/ Kiss my ass!!! In your ear. That’s kinky; I like that. It’s the right thing to do. Richard, I want...

Every day InnocentEnglish.com posts a new funny or cool Quick Break. The Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones so you can browse through any you missed. Â A palindrome is a word or phrase that is the same whether it is read forwards or backwards. A good palindrome also...

Asumptions are always dangerous. Elvis is fuckin’ dead man, get some cd’s! OLD PETE!!!!!! Unbenfuckinlivable When this is all over, remind me to kick your ASS! You are not taking my truck!! *cocks gun* How far you got to go? Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Chill Factor’: Quotes from the movie ‘Chill...

…and these frauds, these traitors, they know who they are …he was a child just like us, a child with a great vision of the world …let us pray, pray that we shall have the strength to fulfill his vision… I need thy help now; to end this madness and evil, do not forsake me now It was a lie that Noah,...

Death in heartland America, a tragedy in macabre proportions, I can honestly tell you that I’ve never seen anything as shocking as what was discovered earlier today in this sleepy little farming community of Gatlin, Nebraska. Over 50 bodies found in various stages of decomposition have been...

* Sara and I went to play at our old house but Malakai said it was forbidden. I think he was really just jealous cause no one ever asked him to play too! * ah moeder ruft and all of you shall feel his wrath! behold a dream did come tome in the night and the lord ounlay show this to me he tould me...

A boom a rang rang Are we being punished? children of a lesser god Do you think there’s someplace where we can meet that’s not in silence and not in sound? I am falling in Lo…I am falling….into the pool! Sex was always something I could do as well as hearing girls. Better. Shouting at the back of a...

Her name is grace I don’t, i hate her, i’m glad she’s dead she hit you she told me to stay in the closet, no mater what i was to stay in the closet what did she do that made you want to kill her What if I take her back to Canada to where it happened, Maybe it will trigger a memory.” What if I...

1) (covered in attacking chickens) Mrs. Tweedy!!!! The chickens are revolting!!!!!!!!!!! 2) (not even looking in her husbands direction, and think he means revolting as in disgusting) Finally, something we agree on. 1) In all my life i have never heard a bigger load of TRIPE!!!! The chances of us...

Hard to imagine. Have yourself a merry little Christmas. Is that a cock in your mouth or do you like sticking your dirty fingers up your fucking asshole you cocksucker. Joy to the world. Nod off. Secret girl. Watch the fat man swing. Who are you? Why does everything have to be so fucked up? Page...

Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones were absolutely fantastic singing and dancing quite well in the movie Chicago.They are absolutely gorgeous. Roxy-I’m a star…and the audience loves me. And they love me for lovin’ them and I love them for lovin’ me, and we looooove each other…and that’s...

Cindy: Girls have to do everything. Boys are totally clueless when it comes to sex. It starts with them trying to unhook our bras, fumbling around, and it never changes. Wait until they try to put their dick into you. Diana: Please don’t say they need help with that. Cindy: Always. Cindy: I’d like...

(At Graduation): Cheater… Cheated on the mid-term. – How does $47.00 sound? – I was thinking more along the lines of 250 – You are so greedy! – It is what it is… But WHAT ABOUT THE DOBERMAN east lincoln high school is so gay Handsom: Bullshit is in the details. Handsome: wow thats a work of art....

#1-You were checkin me out right there weren’t you? #2-Yes I was and what are you gonna do about it? #1-12 kids later and we still got the heat!!! 1. They set me on fire! 2. They were welcoming you into the family, and it was just your jeans. 1. It may have been only my jeans, but what if next...