Innocent English

-They stole? -They liberated funds. -Theft is theft. There is no gray area. -Hey, Matsu, New York is one big gray area. 1/_He might as well be an American, his kind respects just one thing…. *money* 2/_And what do you respect….*love*? 1/_Sometimes ya gotta forget ya head and grab ya balls...

chanting Troops of men echo him Men: King Leo’s got a great big castle, Jamal: We’re gonna shove it right up his a**hole! Men: We’re gonna shove it right up his a**hole! Jamal: Sound off! Men: 1,2! Jamal: Break it on down! Men: Uh, uh, uh-uh!! and that, is the rope-a-dope i got a whole thing of tic...

1) Youre not planning on going in there are you? 2) In, Through and beyond! A pint can not hold a quart, CHARACTER NAME. If iit holds a pint, it is doing the best that it can. Can you speak? I said, are you programmed to speak? Charlie Charlie Charlie: You know what they say, all work and no...

There’s still men out there, Goddamn,when I go home, People ask me why you do it Hoot? WHY? You some kinda war junkie, I won’t say a goddamn word why? They won’t understand, they won’t understand why we do it, they won’t understand it’s about the men next to you that’s it, that’s all it is When I...

ATF – Alcohol Tobacco and Fuckups how can you put a truck through that much hell and not have any thing break Jack: Remember what I said about down shifting and breaking just right? Sonny: Ya Ya Jack: Tisk, Tisk LOOK OUT!!!!!!!!! One fart n your walking RIDE YOUR BRAKES RIDE YOUR BRAKES WELCOME TO...

–Georgie introduced me to Mack Sennett. I helped him build that housing project he was putting up underneath that god-awful sign. –Hollywoodland. –I don’t get modern art. –I doubt modern art gets you, either. Fire and Ice. Hitler was a bit excessive. Kay was always there. Always in the middle, but...

Are you high? It’s freezing out there! Barb: (to anonymous filthy phone-caller) Oh, why don;t you go find a wall socketm and stick your tongue in it. That’ll give you a charge!! Barb: Darling, You can’t rape a townie! Claire:No Jess, that’s okay. I have to finish packing anyway. Jess: Hasn’t she...

Goodbye, my sweet one. I hated saying goodbye to that plucky little pony. I’ll miss that plucky little pony! The story of my life is the story of the people in it. I haven’t always been as lucky as I am, in this delicious place with grass, and water, and sunshine. Mine is a story of trust and...

–Just like old times. –Yeah, you start trouble and I start bleeding. I never saw a man who could hold his liquor like a bottle. I’ve dug for gold, silver, lead, mercury. Killing a man don’t prove you’re a man. The people some people marry. Who remembers a loser, or even cares? If you win, you’re...

–Bodega Bay. Where’s that? –Up the coast, about 60 miles north of here. –What is it you’re looking for, sir? –Lovebirds. Don’t they ever stop migrating? FOSSE! FOSSE! FOSSE! He’s got a client who shot his wife in the head six times. Six times? Can you imagine it? I mean, even twice would be...

Canaries are always behind bars anyway. I’m going to make my self a Levenworth Cocktail. It has been the home of such notorious figures as Al Capone, Baby Face Nelson, and Machine Gun Kelly. Look around you, Stroud. This is going to be your home for as long as you live. One thing I’ve learned is...

So this is Hell. And there’s a crucifix in it. People in this country aren’t interested in details. They only trust headlines. #1: Let’s try walking #2: Holding the sandwich? #1: I was adorable once. Young and full of hope! And now look at me, I’m this fat, short, insecure, middle-aged THING! #2: I...

1)I need a bath! I need a manicure! I need to sleep! 2)I need a beer! 1. What are you doing here? 2. Being shot in the butt! 555-7000. I hate to be an old woman, MaryAnn, but my paranoia keeps me alive. I just took a shower with the cockroach from hell — he’s in the bathroom right now doing his...

Monic-Russel, There are beer cans in the trash in the kitchen, there are beer cans in the trash in the bathroom, there are beer cans in the trash in the basement, What does that say ? Russil- were out of beer? *Flashback* (Doyle jumps off the roof with an umbrella in hand) Bud: Fly, Mary Poppins....

Eli: I can’t believe you. Here we are trapped, and all you can think of is pushing that stupid little button. Lennie (teasing): Your not my boss! (pushes button at each comma and period) Now he’s hamburger, now he’s not, now he’s hamburger, now he’s not. i’m a sherman tank [ Bingo has had a date...

‘Man it’s hot. It’s like Africa hot. Tarzan couldn’t take this kind of hot.’ …and a happy el malagueno to you Jerome. 1. Come to mama 2. Is it OK if we don’t use the word mama? It makes me think of my mother and that kind of ruins it you know 1. She could be anywhere under a desk, or on an ironing...

Every day InnocentEnglish.com posts a new funny or cool Quick Break. The Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones so you can browse through any you missed. Â Â Â Here are some very funny Simpsons quotes, lines and sayings, from The Simpsons TV show. Comic Book Guy: Last...

Back to school back to school to prove to daddy i am not a fool i got my shoes tied tight i hope i dont get in a fight back to school back to school [ the bus rides by } Your only cool if you pee in your pants (1) …we’ve got some important inforamtion for you (2)aaaaawww erwic’s pregnant! (pat,...

Now which is it gonna be? Drive your car into the lake or get a dislocated elbow? Okay now, which is it gonna be? Drive your car in the lake or get a dislocated elbow? –You’re making a mistake. –I made ’em before. And where’s Bob and Jack Kennedy? Bernard, I want you to know… that I try. When Jean...

1)i’ll show you me fanny if you want 2)Nah, you’re righ’ 1. Aren’t you a bit old miss? 2. Not me. You! I’m the bloody teacher! 1. Have you noticed anything odd about Billy lately? 2. What are you after, like a list? 1. I used to go to ballet school. 2. See? 3. Yeah, for your nana. For girls, not...