Innocent English

Burn rubber, not your soul Burn Rubber…..Not Your Soul Can you keep up? I said we ridin or, you just blowin smoke. It’s Not The Bike……It’s Not The Engine……IT’S THE RIDER! Racing without a lid man you not just drunk, you crazy. racing without a lid. Man you dumber then i thought Someone bing told by...

…and I swear I never, and I don’t know who could’ve if didn’t, I never pissed in your steam iron. …your living under the booted foot of the lifeguard state. They’re already taking over the point. Are you pickin’ on me??!!! Back home, being young is just something you do until you become an adult....

Lords of Death. Street gang. Punks from Chinatown. ‘Chinese girls don’t come with green eyes.’ (egg)It will come out no more!(jack) What egg? What won’t come out no more?! (Jack) Hollow? (wang) Hollow. (jack) fuck it! (Jack) Listen, I’m gonna report an incodent and I don’t wanna here ‘act of God’...

#1 What the hell are Gators? #2 Football… College. #1 Morons. #2 Uh huh. (in russian accent) We sponsor girls softball team. ….Yes, and if you don’t calm down you’ll be wearing MY handcuffs in YOUR Godamn house. 1) Make her stop! God in heaven, make her stop! She wants my soul!!2) Arugula! Arugula!...

–Can you tell me the price of this bed? –Eight thousand dollars. –Why that’s preposterous! I can get the same bed anywhere in town for twenty-five dollars. –Yes, but not with me in it! –I’ll take your picture. Hey! Look at me and laugh. –I’ve been doing that for 20 years. –Look at me and laugh....

–American? –Yeah, I came over here during the war and couldn’t find my way home. –Did you find what you wanted? –Yes, thanks. –I could make your business my business. –You wouldn’t like it, the pay’s too small. –What’s wrong with you? –Nothing you can’t fix. –You go too far, Marlowe. –Those are...

–Did I kill the guy that killed me? –Yes. It’s just one of your balls, Smitty. These mines were not designed to kill you, just castrate ya. Survival is the only glory of war. The Bangalore Torpedo was 50′ long and packed with 85 pounds of TNT and you assembled it along the way. I’d love to meet the...

–So, did you grow up out here, Nick? –No, I’m from Ohio. –Oh, really. My first wife is from Illinois. –You’re shooting a movie? What’s it called? –Yeah, it’s called ‘Coffins from Hell.’ –Mm, what’s it about? –Coffins from hell. And then he turned around and crapped in my face, litterally! How’s...

Bite your teeth into the ass of life. Give to people what they want, then later you can give them what you want. I get a side order of spaghetti with this, right? I’m a businessman. I’m anything I need to be at anytime. Secondo: Sometimes spaghetti just likes to be alone. Secondo: What’s the matter...

(In lower tone) Whose money Big Baby? (In regulair tone) My money Mutha Faku! C’mon baby, give me a heart-attack. I want one real bad. fuck what you heard and lay it to rest, big sugar’s here now in living flesh. you’ve been needin my help and needin it nifty cuz shit on your force is a little bit...

This is not Nam, this is bowling. There are rules! This is not Nam, this is bowling. There are rules. (1)I’LL GET THIS GUN, STICK IT UP UR ASS AND PULL ON THE TRIGGER TILL IT GOES CLICK, WHOA (2) 8 YEAR OLDS DUDE..EIGHT YEAR OLDS #1: I told those fucks down at the league office a thousand times...

–Call her. –All right. Anything for my art. –What do you think of women, kiddie? –Oh, there’s room in the world for ’em. How can life be so empty? I’ll break you! The theater’s a stunted bleeding stump. Even stars have to wait years for one decent play. They hire girls like me to entertain the...

(1) And I only have one request. (2) Oh, yeah? What’s that? (2) That you take me as your concubine, or Phil here, if you find him more attractive. –Throw me in the water and see if I can swim. –I think you’re missing the point, Bob. We’re about to throw you off a cliff and see if you can fly....

#1-Who are you? #2-Jacob McCandles. #1-I thought you was dead. #2-Not hardly. –I thought you were dead. –Not hardly. –They tell me you killed two good men in a fair fight tonight. That true? –No, three, counting you. 1) Sight of blood bother you? 2) Only my own. 1)Tell the Indian to go for a walk...

#1 Can I ask you a question? #2 Yeah baby. #1 Where the FUCK have you been all week? #1 Here read this. #2 Father. I have been abduct. I am fine. #1 Abducted. #2 It says abduct. #1 Just say abducted. #2 I have been abducted. I am fine right now but I might not be for loring. If you do not pay the...

–Hey, that’s nice perfume. –Something new. It attracts mosquitoes and repels men. –I’ll have your badge and gun. Now! –You can have it. Permanently. –They come and go like flies. –Only this fly got herself strangled. Go ahead…Shoot! Hey, I like this. Early nothing. I want to find out facts. I’m...

Become part of the nightmare turn yourself into a monster and fight back c’mon Larry he’s divorced too! Hi, I’m Larry! Jeffery: Hey, we may not be the sharpest tools in the shed but we know the difference between a good time and a bad time Larry: And this is not a good time. Newt:Oh my beautiful...

Every day InnocentEnglish.com posts a new funny or cool Quick Break. The Quick Break section has today’s quick break plus previous ones so you can browse through any you missed. Â Here are some more humorous sayings and silly or witty quotes Religion cannot be without morality, but morality may...

–You students here? –No, we were students at Berkeley in 1968. And you call yourself a detective? Aunt Sonya! Bakunin was a terrorist monster. You are not an authority on Bakunin just because you used to date every terrorist in Soviet Russia. That does not make you an authority. Come on, children....

…There’s some good eatin here in my legs though! 1 she got a glass eye 2iheard she got it from a gypsy 1 whats a gypsy 2your mommas a gypsy 1 your mommas a bitch 1) Can I take your picture? 2) you don’t need a picture..just look up handsome in the dictionary 1) She’s got a glass eye 2) I heard she...