Innocent English

#1: DON’T SHOOT THE BOMB! #2: DON’T SHOOT ME EITHER!!! 1) There are two things you need to do. 2) Would one of them be shiting my pants. 1) Where are you? 2) The corner of Eat Shit and Fuck You. 1) Why’d you take me here? Who the hell are you! 2)Were with the CIA 1)Oh I see, ya’ll shot someone and...

(ending scenes) 1. Hey, Syd, Mike says you ain’t shit! 2. Now why would you spout off some crazy shit like that? (pointing gun at redgie) move nigga get out the way, see you on the highway, get the fuck out of MY way – –Did you see that? –They’re throwing cars at us. How could I not see that? –Is...

Whattya mean??, you slept in my bed, didnt you feel the dents???, Baby you dont want that, you dont want that, cause when I come, I COME WITH THE THUNDER!!. (1) Can we help you? (2) Hey, I ‘staked’ out in that car all night too, I should at least be allowed to take a peek. (1) This is real police...

…Both deaths due to close encounters with stationary objects; office door for Mr. Cosgrove, ’89 Porsche for Mr. Seagrave. 1) Son you know that little glow thats starting to blink in the corner of your eye. Thats your career disapation light it just went into overtime. 2) If anyone lights were about...

I can shoot fleas of a horses back with this gun Tannen and its pointed right at your head #1)That’s a very interesting story Future boy but there’s just one thing the doesn’t make sense. If the me in the future is now in the past, how could you possibly know about it? #2) you sent me a letter....

(1)Those boards don’t work on water…(2) Unless you got power… –However, the destruction may be very localized. Possibly limited to our own galaxy. –Well, that’s a relief. –Where do you put in the quarter? –What’s a quarter? 1) Age: Forty Seven 2) Forty Seven! That’s one Hell of a face lift 1) He’s...

Get your meat hooks off of me! Hello, anybody home, think Mcfly…think! I think it’s terrible, girls chasing boys. When I was your age, I never chased a boy, or called a boy, or… sat in a parked car with a boy. Whoa, wait a minute, Doc, are you telling me that my mother …has got the hots for me? #1-...

(1) You must represent darkness, evil and godless communism. (2) You forgot: ugly, lazy and disrespectful. (Singing) Ska, Ska, Ska. Jamaica Ska. 1) Connie, can I ask you one question? 2) I’ve been waiting 20 years. 1) What the hell is a Kahuna anyway? Is it good to have a big one? 1) Okay, but...

#1 What do all men want? #2 He wants you to dress up as Wonder Woman and tie him up with the golden lariet and force him to tell the truth? #1 No, just dinner Philip. #1 Hey you’re big and fat! #2 Yeah, you’re short and ugly. Here’s a pencil. #1 That’s a lovely dress you’re wearing–isn’t that a...

1. A little something for you to think about in the future. 2. AAHHH! 1. Assemble, mourners. 2. Uh, wrong service, father. 3. Oh…is it? 1. From now on, we only date divorcees. 2. Why? 1. Cause we’ll know they’re already ready. 2. And widowers. 1. Can’t forget the widowers. 1. What about my...

#1 I don’t believe the groom has had you yet. #2 No… (in a Southern Belle accent) why no. And where is the groom? #1 He’s in the bed-room. #1: What the hell is going on here!? #2: Oh, no. It’s Mr. Laughs. (1) Just where do you guys think you are? (2)The Library of Congress? (3) Detroit? (4) Beyond...

1-This can’t go on 2-I know, basketball season ends… 2-you’ve got to understand that I’m old enough to be your father 2-your so right dear 1.How’d you get in here? 2.Well, the door was closed, so I opened it and came right in. 1.You remind me of a man. 2.What man? 1.A man with a power. 2.What...

1) I’m coming back next summer. 2) I’ll be 14! 1) I know. 1) It’s my last offer 2) Sounds like your first offer 1)Have you ever been to New York? 2)No 1) It’s the best 2)you mean, like you? 1)He’s a geek! 2) Yeah, but he’s a FREE geek!! 13!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can i have one for jimmy tony...

Guns and butta baby, but y’all wouldn’t know nothing ’bout that, little dum mutha f*ckas I a size 6 now thats average. For who a white girl. Jody baby I’m a size 16 now thats average too I dont wanna reach the gates and Jesus be like turn yo ass around nigga I tell those other girls the truth...

(CLERK) Say, are you feelin’ all right? I heard about your collapse at the town meetin’…Dr. Cooper’s nurse is also our Mayor, you know. (JC) No, I didn’t know that so I’m like…the talk of the town, huh? (CLERK) Yes, so to speak… (JC) A dog? Oh I love looking at them but owning one? Oh, you’ll have...

And you’ll live for the love and the happiness of, This lonely boy… And each night he will say, in a whimsical way, You’re just a toy… C-I-N-C-I-N-N-A-T-I the best town in O-H-I-O USA Children: We will scream, we will shout. Trees: Still, you can’t get out. Cincin whatsi For awhile Bo Peep,...

( Esme is calling the pig and Babe is hidden in the hay in front of Fly, Rex and the Horse ) Fly: Come dear, you’re bein’ called. ( Esme continues calling Babe ) Rex: Babe. Babe: ( from inside hay ) Babe’s not here. Rex: You can’t undo what’s happened, son, but you can make up for it. Fly: Babe,...

( little girl opens present to reveal house, cries out ) Esme: WHAT’S WRONG, DEAR? Little girl: IT’S THE WRONG ONE! ( yelling ): I WANT THE HOUSE I SAW ON THE TELEVISION!!!!!!!!!! (sung) If I had words to make a day for you. I’d give you a morning… golden and true. I would make this day last… for...

ahh its the pepsi truck.. the damn pepsi drunk.. mother’s cookies… mother’s DAMN cookies Figi water.. the damn figi water.. If the shoe fits wear it, if its too tight TAKE IT OFF! #1:) It says here that the rich and famous people hang out the polo lounge. I don’t know nothin’ about no damn polo....

Can I interest you in a battery-operated vagina? Can I intrest you in a battery powered vagina? -Max Dance with the devil and the devil dont change, the devil changes you does your mother have any teeth, because if she does, send her down, you fuck. I don’t buy it. I don’t endorse it. I just point...