Innocent English

Here are some funny limericks that reference limericks. Inside joke poems poking fun at the process of writing limericks. Credit is given when it’s known. Limericks about Limericks There was a young poet quite fine, Whose limericks repeated a line. Though this was redundant, Though this was...

Blond Joke Poems I can’t resist including these funny poems, by Graham Lester, which are also funny blonde jokes. A blonde girl named Emily Skinner Would not eat a bite of her dinner She’d been painting her door And the man at the store Had told her she had to get thinner Once a sleepy blonde...

The Royal Flush: (For Duane) A Funeral Poem by the nineteenth century transcendentalist, Henry Waldo Liverworth That day is etched upon my brain The death of my beloved Duane. I found him there, simply floating So sad to see him stiff and bloating I pressed against him with my ear But there was no...

Two Beautiful Wedding and Love Poems: The Broken Vow and Husbands Take Heed These two poems are by one of the most beloved transcendentalist couples of the mid-19th century, and together they paint a complete picture of a heart breaking story of love and its demise. The Broken Vow By William...

These funny bloopers are actual mistakes by students I have tutored in Conversational English, and are from my humor book . Â Â Here are a few dating jokes: Â Â I was walking to school one day, when suddenly a beautiful woman cut my eye. I fell in love with her the first time I sawed her. She had a...

Here are the top facts about Verne Troyer. (The actor who played Mini Me) Verne Troyer can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell “What the hell was that?” In a recent survey it was discovered the 52% of...

The Best, Funny, not so Inspirational Sayings of Jack Handey (or Jack Handy) I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a...

Funny, Dumb, and not so Inspirational Sayings of Jack Handey (or Jack Handy) I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a...

Funny, not so Inspirational Quotes and Sayings of Jack Handey (or Jack Handy)I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a...

Funny, not so Inspirational Sayings of Jack Handey (or Jack Handy)I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a comedy writer...

Funny, not so Inspirational Sayings of Jack Handey (or Jack Handy)I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a comedy writer...

Funny, not so Inspirational Sayings of Jack Handy (or Jack Handey) I always thought Jack Handy was a fictional character created by the Saturday Night Live writers. I thought they got together and wrote “Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy”. But it turns out,Jack Handey is a real person, and a comedy...

InnocentEnglish.com’s list of the best, worst, funniest, saddest and most unfortunate Bushisms from 2006. 1. “That’s George Washington, the first president, of course. The interesting thing about him is that I read three — three or four books about him last year. Isn’t that interesting?” — During...

The best and funiest actual George W. Bush quotes, bloopers, mistakes and Bushisms from 2006 Some might see some of these President Bush quotes as stupid, dumb, embarassing or even shameful. but others simply see a man who has such a brilliant genius of a mind, his brain just can’t keep up. (that...

An Inspirational Address to the Nation By George W. Bush Compiled entirely out of actual Bush quotes, by InnocentEnglish.com My Fellow Americans, During these holiday seasons, we thank our blessings.1 I want to thank my friend, Senator Bill Frist, for joining us today. … He married a Texas girl, I...

Funny Wedding Jokes, Marriage Jokes and humorous stories For Wedding Toasts, Sermons, Speeches, Rehearsal Dinner Stories, etc. Good Wedding Jokes: The Donkey Trick A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town, and on this...

  Here are a few really funny church jokes:   Sarah hadn’t been to church lately, so her minister thought he’d go pay her a visit and see how the 85 year old church matriarch was doing. He knocked on her door and after a time he heard her spirited voice hollerA little boy was attending his...

Good sermon jokes: Some clean jokes for sermons, speeches, Wedding Toasts, etc. Sermon Joke #1: Minister Jokes: The Preacher’s Visit Sarah hadn’t been to church lately, so her minister thought he’d go pay her a visit and see how the 85 year old church matriarch was doing. He knocked on her door and...

  Some funny animal pics:   A very determined bear after a bird feeder. Geeze, why do these humans have to make it so hard? I ain’t no circus bear! A fearless fox diving into the snow Hmm, maybe I didn’t think this through so well. Maybe nobody is looking… Just act cool… Act like you are...

  Here are some Funny Pics of Kittens and Puppies:   Huge Furry Pet Monster (I thought this was an alien species of cat, but the Sorensen Kids emailed me to say their scientific conclusion is that it is a the wild, elusive, Great White Himalayan Fur Bunny. (Or maybe a pet rabbit). So thanks for...