Innocent English

1. Do you like the way I walk? 2. Poetry in motion. 1. I learned when I was a baby, been walking for years. Cancel my order! My patient has developed some instabilities which make his judgment questionable. He’s so low that if they bury him….. they’ll have to dig UP….. Him- when do you have to be...

#1 The O-NEEDERS! #2 That’s the Wonders #1: Was she a good kisser? #2: Yeah…It would be ungentlemanly for me to elaborate. #1: Ah, gentlemen. I forgot what you guys looked like. (Singing) IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII Quit! (snaps) I quit(snaps). I quit. *singing* It hurts me so just to see you go around...

A man who can flush a rat, can do anything. But but but, I don’t have any money! Hello. My name is Norman Bulansky. Welcome to my home. Would you like a doughnut? Lord here comes the rat! He died an honorable, brave rat’s death. Oh boy. Oh boy. But but but I need my keys! Oh boy. Oh boy. Hello. My...

He was the chief doctor of Auschwitz, who killed 2.5 million people, experimented with children – Jewish and non-Jewish – using twins mostly, injecting blue dyes into their eyes to make them acceptable Aryans, amputating limbs and organs from thousands without anesthetics. Oh man, you’re weird....

1.You’d better get over here! 2. What is it? 1. It’s Patty Vare! 2. What happened to her? 1. She was running from the cops on her horse, it looks like all of a sudden, she fell off and got knocked unconscious. 2. What are we gonna’ do with her? 1. Can we risk moving her? 2. Are you kidding?! 1....

–How do you want your eggs? Poached, fried, or raw? –Scrambled, like your head. Gee, Dad, you look real beat! Gee, Mom, you look real groovy. Hello? Hello? She: Beauty parlors, YUCK! I do my own. He: So thats why we couldn’t find the eggbeater. Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Boy, Did I Get a Wrong...

Here’s another good inspirational story: A Letter To Patrick Dear Patrick, I was then an only child who had everything I could ever want. But even a pretty, spoiled and rich kid could get lonely once in a while so when Mom told me that she was pregnant, I was ecstatic. I imagined how wonderful you...

Here’s another good inspirational story: A Letter From Jesus Dear Friend, I just had to write to tell you how much I love you and care for you. Yesterday, I saw you walking and laughing with your friends; I hoped that soon you’d want Me to walk along with you, too. So, I painted you a sunset to...

Here’s another good inspirational story: A Gift Of Love “Can I see my baby?” the happy new mother asked. When the bundle was nestled in her arms and she moved the fold of cloth to look upon his tiny face, she gasped. The doctor turned quickly and looked out the tall hospital window. The baby had...

1) hey it’s either a cockroach or a bloodhound it can’t be both. 2) a mixed metaphor is the least of your problems my friend. 1) Well he’ll want to talk about it. 2) that’s it just talk? 1) days and nights of talking, marathon talking, about how and why we can build from a new foundation; I’ll...

Has it ever occurred to you that women can sometimes be of more help than men? I’m only sorry for all the wasted years I’ve been without you. Now I’ve kissed you through two centuries. Poor Emma – what will become of her? They told me of your victories, but not the price you paid. what happened...

Goddamn you, man. Don’t you bloody contradict me. He was insubordinate,cowardly and insubordinate so he will go under the lash and we will go round the horn.Are you afraid Mr. christian? I AM IN HELL! HELL, SIR! MR FRYER SIR COME BACK ERE! Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Bounty, The’: Quotes from...

1-So how have you been? Good. You? 2-Good. Busy. 3-All right, lets cut this tea party chatter! All I want is a mink coat and a TV small enough to fit in my purse. if you saw a good vantriliquist who would you compliment, the dumby? You do what I am telling you Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Born...

Can anyone tell me the music title track in the opening of the movie. That is a great song and the horns are just fabulus. What is the name of the song? Who performed and or wrote it? GIRL)so how is a mama initiated? BIKER1)by getting it from every member of the group. GIRL)Oh jeez you guys are...

Here’s another good inspirational story: How Do You Expect to Get Into Heaven? An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him, “How do you expect to get into heaven?” The boy thought it over and said, “Well, I’ll just run in and out and in and out and keep...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Honk If You Love Got a letter from Grandma the other day. She writes: Today I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a “Honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir...

Here’s another good inspirational story: HMO Nurse Three nurses all arrived at the gates of Heaven at the same time and were met by Saint Peter. St Peter asked one nurse, “How have you spent your life?” She replied, “I was an emergency room nurse. I was stressed out a lot and we couldn’t save...

1) I’m going to scream! 2) Worse thing you could you. Uses up all the air. 1) *screams* 1) Now just a minute, Gregory. DC’s a cat. He can’t help his instincts. He’s a hunter, just like you are, except he has more sense than to sit out in the pouring rain all day. 2) Well! 1. Bad, bad cat! Aah! 2....