Innocent English

(he is holding someone at gunpoint and trips as they are walking to the car)BAM!BAM! (shots fired)Are you OK?Yea,but I think I killed that tree. 1.HOLD YOUR FIRE OK?I BROUGHT THE WRONG BULLETS! Every man a king. He released this gas and I think he released it with his toes. I’m looking for short...

1)They have taken him. 2)Woah! How’d he do that? 3)Like this – They have taken him. 1. Adam, you’re driving! 2. Yeah, ain’t it bitchin’? 1: How’d you get out of the handcuffs? 2: I swallowed a key last Thursday. 2: Howd you know you were going to be handcuffed. 3: I didn’t. I swallow a key EVERY...

Bus Ticket salesman: Where to? Gib:Nowhere, Just browsing. Gary: Hi, I’m Gary Cooper, but not the Gary Cooper that’s dead. Gib: Thanks for the ride i’ve been out here all day! I’m Not interrupting anything am I? Man: No me and the wife are just having a little squabble okay. Gib: Oh, its not easy...

–I was raised up in Indiana.–Well, that could be either good or bad. –It’s gold, Henry. –Gold? –Jake, how would you like the job as my deputy?–I’d hate it! Even if I lived through it, I’d hate it! –Like you said ‘The law is the law and we have to face up to it sometime.’–When did I say that? –She...

. . . I wanna hold you ’til I die, ’til we both break down and cry. I wanna hold you ’til the fear in me subsides. . . I just feel really bad for u cause i guess u didnt know u were competing aginst a SUPERSTAR!!!!! #1:what do you think slater would do for the talent competition?? #2:maybe he would...

Gods… are selfish beings who fly around in little red capes and don’t share their power with mankind. No, I don’t want to be a *god*. I just want to bring fire to the people… and I want my cut. hgkuyriytrflutiv76vtouhgikuyrf I would trade 30,000 coconuts and every ounce of your blood for a quart of...

(1) How can I help? (2) Get this man a helmet! Oh, it’s you. Forget the helmet! (1) I didn’t have my camera with me. (2) A photographer eats with his camera, a photographer sleeps with his camera! (3) I’m glad I’m a writer. (1) That’s his sister, Vera Webster. (2) The picture looks fuzzy. (1)...

If Paris is gonna go kablooie, I want my best reporter right in the middle of it! #1: Oh my God. #2:No; Zod. (1) Have you seen the movie, Texas Chainsaw Massacre? (2) No. It is good? (1) Oh, I’ve got to tell you, I love this film. It had passion and a plucky spirit. And, the characters had...

… no careless product of a wild imagination… 1) Easy Miss, I’ve got you. 2) You’ve got me? Who’s got YOU? 1/ What are you writing, Miss Lane? 2/ An ode to spring…….. how do you spell *massacre*??? 1/_Otisberg??!! 2/_It’s a little-bitty place! haha…..told ya, i go to all expense to make you feel...

a tree ……..what is a tree k Bianca: I’m getting out of here. (starts running offf, and a lighting force pushes her back against the wall) Bianca: I’m staying, like I said, I’m staying. earth you mean where my cousin went k i am kara of argo city daughter of alura and zorel and i dont scar easily k...

Can you dig it? deputy reardon: Who the hell do you think you are talking to? Priest: I’m talking to you, you redneck faggot. Freddie’s Dead. Look, I know it’s a rotten game, but it’s the only one The Man left us to play. Pusherman. You’re gonna give all this up? Eight-track stereo, color TV in...

. . .1 . . .2 . . .3 . . .do eet. ILL TAKE A LITER OF COLA: ONE LITER OF COLA, DO WE SELL A LITER OF COLA #1-Who wants a moustache ride? #2-I do, I do! #3-Me too, me too! #1: Another highway cop? What are you guys multiplying? #2: yeah if they could figure out what hole to stick it in. #1: But our...

(After Mario and Luigi had been transpointed in dinohattan) Mario:Where the hell are we? This is sound crazy,butt…this is cant be manhattan! Luigi:I dont know,i havent been manhattan couple weeks. Mario:Must have been bad couple weeks… (Daisy is kidnapped by Iggy and Spike.Mario and Luigi run,butt...

–Order! Order! –Yeah, a hot dog and a bottle of pop. –Tell me something, Mrs. Retread… –Treadwell is my name. –I wonder what the poor people are doing. –Aren’t you being a trifle forward? –I could move back. –You can’t throw us out. We got a ninty-nine year lease. –Yeah, we would have made it a...

I can’t see things that are right in front of me, and I can see things that couldn’t be there. I’m telling you, she’s the key. What’s the first time I’m going to see? You know his name? Your eyes are having a delayed reaction to reality? Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Blink’: Quotes from the movie...

–You’re a wise man. –Ain’t so. I’m a bartender. boom That gun’s not loaded – this one is! You the law? Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Blind Justice’: Quotes from the movie ‘Blind Justice’

#1We’re musicans…from L.A. We’re called Group Therepy. 2# Group Therepy? #3 We were called Group therepy, then we changed it to Before Christ…check out the shirt. #2 B.C. B.C B.C B.C Bless the beasts and the children. move you god damn useless dings MOVE! Page Topic: Movie Quotes from ‘Bless the...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Signs Seen In Front Of Churches “Looking for a sign from God? This is it.” “No God — No Peace. Know God — Know Peace.” “Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!” “Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.” “Searching for a new look? Have your faith...

Here’s another good inspirational story: Christian Pickup Lines 1) Nice bible. 2) I would like to pray with you. 3) You know Jesus? Me too. 4) God told me to come talk to you. 5) I know a church where we could go and talk. 6) How about a hug, sister? 7) Do you need help carrying your bible? It...